Ex sex is usually pretty good and on-demand easy. The problems usually arise the next day when the old tensions that caused the break-up resurface.
Just keep her in your back pocket for those occassions when other plans don't work out.
...of the 9.999 hundred thousand other loves
statistically, some of them would be equally nice...
Ex sex is usually pretty good and on-demand easy. The problems usually arise the next day when the old tensions that caused the break-up resurface.
Just keep her in your back pocket for those occassions when other plans don't work out.
Plenty of good advice for the OP. Try to lay low and just hang on for a month or so. You'll be amazed how different it'll feel.
I believe old age works like this.
Not sure about middle age. I'm sub-40, but I think I've had (or am still having, not quite sure) a midlife crisis.
Move on and don't look back.
PS..buy a new watch.
If it's broken you can't fix it. Keep your dignity and pride and try to move on as best possible; time will heal the wounds and it will get better. I had a yo-yo relationship once, and once out of it realised that getting back together was only ever like a sticking plaster, but you waste your best years finding this out.
Oh and delete her number from your phone and join Tinder
I happen to notice two common themes in this thread:
First, the we have all been dumped point;
Second, the suggestion to find immediate alternative easy sex cos after all that's all a woman is for.
I have wonder whether there might be any correlation between these...
I'm not sure whether you literally meant literary...
But after my pretty extensive research on the subject I have come to a different conclusion.
Jo, don't take male bravado literally (or literary) when it comes to discussion about the opposite sex. It's similar when girls talk about boys. In-group speak. It's a unique form of communication.
Apologies if this has been posted before ,but it does cover a lot of what this thread is about .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKWmFWRVLlU
Entirely possible - even likely - that theres someone else - even if only in the pipeline - though not nearly as inevitable as certain (obviously bitter) "experts" have tried to indicate...
...you know what though? Best thing to happen to you - trust me - you don't want to be with someone who has any reservation about you - that applies equally to friendship, business and love.
Get out there now and do stuff I will be only too happy to discuss in the bear pit - you lucky f***er
In this scenario, the more you try, the more she'll fly. Don't call, keep your distance and don't wait for her. If it's meant to be it will happen naturally.
It's just a matter of time...
Spot on, as have been the majority of replies to this thread.
You have dodged a bullet. If this happened a few years down the line and there were kids, mortgages or a marriage certificate involved, you'd be in a far worse position.
Give yourself some time. Enjoy life and you'll find someone else who is far better for you
I've recently gone through this and tried everything possible with an ex that I didn't realise I missed so much
Thing is you just end up pissing them off
They've made their decisions
I did flowers for weeks, tried to get a meet etc
She cuts me off when I try and call
It hurts and torments so try and stay busy
It's still killing me but I accept there's nothing I can do
Sorry bud
Get over it and move on ... Once a relationship is broken it really is better to move on and don't look back in anger! Ha .
There are lots of other Woman out there and in reality obviously you were simple not meant to be ... We are as people constantly evolving and changing and part of that is leaving old relationships behind and making new ones ... I have always managed to stay good friends with exes all of that history and fun together need not be discarded ! .
But if nothing else walk away with your head held high .. If you don't and drop into the rather pathetic pleading to have you back , then when you are over her you will regret that ! So get out there fill your boots and enjoy . Life is too short to do anything else
Been following this thread, funnily enough whilst clearing out my Mum's house ready for her move I came across some pictures of myself and my (then) girlfriend from about 30 years ago. She wasn't my first girlfriend but she was the first one I introduced to my parents, (I thought it was getting serious!)
I looked back at those photos and my immediate reaction was:- I fancied THAT????!!!!! Was I blind? Why didn't my guide dog give me better advice????!!!! I felt no connection to the picture, no memories stirred, no emotions rekindled....... Nothing. All I can think of was I escaped, dodged the bullet, Came out on top.
I won't deny that I was upset at the time, but I didn't beg her to have me back. (I do feel that that is what she wanted me to do.) I moped around for a couple or three months before picking myself up, found a 999 bird, went to Le Mans and had a brilliant time with a group of friends and some girls we met down there and I have spent the intervening years enjoying myself, enjoying life, being my own man.
Not "winning her back" was one of the best things I ever did.
I can categorically state that in the history of the universe, no woman has ever decided to split up with a man and then 2 days later upon receiving teary eyed sobbing phone calls and pleading text messages has then thought 'hold on, I've made a mistake'.
As stated before there will probably be someone else in the picture, whether they know it or not. This won't have been a spur of the moment decision either.
We've all been through this, so there is no shame in that. It's how you deal with it that counts - not so much from a macho perspective but purely from keeping your sanity.
Firstly, cut off all contact.
One of the 'get outs' women use is the old 'we can still be friends'. This will open up a whole new world of heartache to you whereby on a superficial level you will be able to chat like nothing has happened yet she is no longer your girlfriend.. This will create further confusion for you as you will cling to the hope that you will reconcile . .then eventually she will casually drop into the conversation that she has met someone else..not only will you feel that your heart has been ripped from your chest but that you have yourself prolonged this situation and allowed her to twist the knife further...of course you can't say anything because she will say ' but we were just friends'.
Women like nothing better when you split upthe ididea that they were the best thing that ever happened to you and that you are crying yourself to sleep over them at night..This enables them to use you as a 'comfort blanket' and allows them to potentially see you as a plan B should it all go tits up and they've made a wrong decision..It also massages their ego.
The best thing to do is maintain radio silence. Take it a day at a time, each day you are wresting more control back and this alone will make you feel better.
I always took the view if she saw me in the street one day and she was with a friend would I rather she was able to say ' oh that was my ex' or 'that was my ex that rang me crying for two months after we split'
It's about self respect..that's not to belittle the emotional turmoil you're going through now but the sooner you take control the sooner you will get over it
good luck
Great thread....
but "MOVE ON" ***shake*** ***shake***
:)
Move on, don't look back ...never look back!
"Never go back" is one of my personal rules.
I broke that rule twice when I was younger and on both occasions it lead to misery for all concerned.
Pubdweller has it spot on.
Good luck!
Change your mobile number . Avoid your now ex girlfriend and go and enjoy yourself .
When a lot of women break up they need to massage their own heart strings by making sure you are 'ok' and they aren't now seen as a bad person as most of them arnt really sure about themselves anyway!
Never give them the satisfaction of any feedback . Avoid avoid avoid.
Laugh and the world laughs with you , cry and you cry alone .
As I said in my earlier post, I went to Le Mans with friends and had a fantastic time. As a suggestion for you, why don't you make a mini bucket list of new activities for you and your mates to do? Nothing too dramatic or expensive, maybe something like a day's clay shooting or an evening's karting, charter a boat and do some mackerel fishing.......whatever takes your fancy really!
Have a bit of a male bonding session trust me you will soon find your mind in a better place and you will be better able to move on. As the friend who helped me get over my break up used to say to me:- Women come and go but you've always got your mates!
Last edited by mattlad; 13th October 2015 at 01:02.
Sorry but he's not and you can't.
I broke up with my last two exes 1) because it just wasn't working and 2) because of passive aggressive neediness.
Nobody else in the picture on either occasion.
Sometimes, just sometimes it's not us, it's not anyone else, it's you.
Absolutely agree
In my case it includes My 3 ex wives, current wife, 90yo mother, 4 daughters and two sisters.
All mad as a sack of frogs.
I am certainly not broken. Not particularly disliked by women either, and I don't dislike them at all. But one does have to realise that they originate from another planet altogether
Last edited by java; 13th October 2015 at 03:01.
With you on this Josh... Every day is a school day.., it's really easy to fall in love, the trick is to sustain it... With my first wife, she was incapable of admitting to anything being her fault and the issues never lay with her... I am now happily married to my lovely wife and although we fall out occasionaly, we are able to deal with it and either of us can accept when we've got something wrong - this and maintaining a sense of humour are key to sustaing a relationship that would otherwise become toxic as petty resentments build and fester...
My ex wife, however, has had 6 different boyfriends in the last 8 years and it's never been her fault when it's ended... Hang on, there's a common denominator here surely???
The point is, that being like this is not at all gender specific...!
Ps... I am in no way suggesting that the OP is at fault!!! And your ex could well be as mad as box frogs!!!