I love my kids..................................

A bit of background.....a few months ago my 20yo step son dropped out of Uni, which I was annoyed about, but accept that it is not for everyone. He has been working part time at McDonalds since he was 16, so has a bit of income. A couple of weeks ago he got offered a job at Halfords as a fitter, but the offer has yet to be received in writing. When this job arrives, it will pay him about £750 a month after tax. Right now, he earns about £450.

While I was on holiday in early September, he phoned as his bank had refused the direct debit for his car insurance. Obviously lent him the cash for that as it is particularly important. One week later he binned his car, writing it off....... good job we helped him out. We found out at that point that he also had a £500 overdraft in addition to having his student loan.

Last week he bounced his £40 mobile phone direct debit, so his finances have obviously not improved.

For a couple of weeks now, he has been banging on about how he needs a replacement car for the one he wrote off, and pointing at the new car deals on offer. My advice to him was that he simply could not afford a finance deal (as demonstrated by the bouncing of direct debits), and that he should buy another cheap run-about until his income improves.

Last night he rocks up in a brand new £12k Vauxhall Corsa which he has bought on finance with a £155 deposit & £270 a month. Firstly, no wonder banks have bad debts if they are willing to lend £12k to someone with little hope of repaying it, but how stupid can he be. By my reckoning his outgoings will be as follows

Car - £270
Insurance - £260 (5 accidents in 2 full years)
Board - £80
Mobile Phone - £40

Total - £650 and I have not included car tax, servicing, petrol, nights out, clothes or any other variable in there.

My wife has the view that he is 20yo and it is his choice (which is true), however my own concern is that his stupidity will affect the family both emotionally and financially for 4 years to come. No way will his £20 a week board get paid, I can imagine regularly being asked to bail him out.... and either having to do so or live with the pain of having refused.

I think I was fair with both of the kids when I bought them each a £750 car and insured them in their first year after they passed their tests, so I dont believe I am an evil step parent, but I do feel very down about his lack of common sense, lack of listening to me as a parent and general attitude.

Nothing anyone can say or do, but I just wanted to get it off my chest.