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Thread: What car, but it has to be cheap and boring!

  1. #1

    What car, but it has to be cheap and boring!

    I have two aging 911 turbos and my wife has replaced her Smart with an A45 AMG, so as a family we are very far from practical. I want to buy a practical, cheap "beater", but not necessarily a shed, just something reliable and cheap to run, insure and tax that I can bomb around in during the winter and when picking up people I don't trust. No idea on the budget, maybe as much as a half decent watch. For instance I'd love a Skoda Yeti, but aside from it not being cheap, my wife has vetoed it. I think I want an estate and it really has to have room for four adults, otherwise we're back where we started.

    Any ideas?

  2. #2
    Master
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    Volvo V70, D5 if you want to run it on a budget, T5 if you want it to go a bit faster

  3. #3
    Grand Master
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    The A Class Merc, pre 2012 was finally a decent car and is astonishingly cheap for what you get and to run, but for a better than it should be beater, the Fiat Panda is hard to beat especially n the 100BHP or FWD variants.

  4. #4
    Master
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    I run a 2009 Mini Clubman Cooper D as my Ďbeaterí. Great for chucking the footballs in, doing runs to the skip, and throwing the dog in.
    Cheap to buy, £30 road tax, £50 in the tank lasts a lifetime.
    They have a tendency to rust on the rear barn doors though (mine are rusty but hey, we call it patina round these parts donít we).

  5. #5
    skoda octavia vrs - runs forever, plenty of room and moves pretty quick.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by adigra View Post
    I think I want an estate and it really has to have room for four adults, otherwise we're back where we started.

    Any ideas?
    Saab 9-3 or 9-5 estate. Just depends on how big you want it, really.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by adigra View Post
    I have two aging 911 turbos and my wife has replaced her Smart with an A45 AMG, so as a family we are very far from practical. I want to buy a practical, cheap "beater", but not necessarily a shed, just something reliable and cheap to run, insure and tax that I can bomb around in during the winter and when picking up people I don't trust. No idea on the budget, maybe as much as a half decent watch. For instance I'd love a Skoda Yeti, but aside from it not being cheap, my wife has vetoed it. I think I want an estate and it really has to have room for four adults, otherwise we're back where we started.

    Any ideas?
    Not sure your definition of half decent but how about something like this:
    https://www.autotrader.co.uk/car-det...sort=price-asc

    Of if okay with higher mileage
    https://www.autotrader.co.uk/car-det...sort=price-asc

  8. #8
    Master
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    Lexus IS250 SE-L

    Audi build, Mercedes comfort and Toyota reliability.

  9. #9
    Lots of good suggestions! Thanks. That's what I was hoping for so now I can spend hours digging thorough the classifieds. Keep it coming!

  10. #10
    Master
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    Smart to AMG lol, a bit of a jump.

    We love our 453 2 seater, wish I went brabus; but canít imagine that jump to the 45, love it!

  11. #11
    Renault Clio DCI, MK 3 onwards. About £30 tax, 60 mpg, cheap parts, easy to service yourself with basic tools.

    Or more up market a VW Passat tdi of some kind

  12. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by Mj2k View Post
    Smart to AMG lol, a bit of a jump.

    We love our 453 2 seater, wish I went brabus; but canít imagine that jump to the 45, love it!
    She got really tired of being bullied on the road and I couldn't blame her. She says it just doesn't happen at all now. Her car has the full aero pack, so wings galore, and she drives it in sport plus. Proper chav.

  13. #13
    Master
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    Focus estate.

    Sent from my Redmi Note 9S using TZ-UK mobile app

  14. #14
    Craftsman
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    Quote Originally Posted by adigra View Post
    She got really tired of being bullied on the road and I couldn't blame her. She says it just doesn't happen at all now. Her car has the full aero pack, so wings galore, and she drives it in sport plus. Proper chav.
    Thatís the only way to drive one !!!


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  15. #15
    Master
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    Sounds like the ideal use case for a Honda Jazz or Civic, reasonable space, performance & servicing costs, & being a Honda it wonít go wrong.

    If bigger is needed add the CRV to the mix.

  16. #16
    Master
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    Kia Sportage 1.7 diesel. 55 mpg and built like a tank. Ultra reliable if serviced on time. Very roomy and if you get up to the Mk3, no electrical gremlins. After that, they went all electrickery and overgreen.

  17. #17
    Grand Master wileeeeeey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by adigra View Post
    She got really tired of being bullied on the road and I couldn't blame her. She says it just doesn't happen at all now. Her car has the full aero pack, so wings galore, and she drives it in sport plus. Proper chav.
    Iíve had three Smart fortwos, I love them, but you do get bullied in them - no question.

  18. #18
    Master thieuster's Avatar
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    Sounds like the ideal use case for a Honda Jazz or Civic, reasonable space, performance & servicing costs, & being a Honda it won’t go wrong.

    If bigger is needed add the CRV to the mix.
    ^^^ this ^^^ CR-Vs are rare as hen's teeth here in the Netherlands, but I know that they're pretty common in the UK. You can easily transport 4 adults in that car without cramped legs etc.

    I’ve had three Smart fortwos, I love them, but you do get bullied in them - no question.
    A friend had the same 'problem'. He's currently solving that problem. He's awaiting delivery of a BMW Alpina B3 Touring...

  19. #19
    Journeyman
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bravo73 View Post
    Saab 9-3 or 9-5 estate. Just depends on how big you want it, really.
    1.8t engine is actually an undertuned 2.0. Simple remap and you have a decent cheap non-shed.

  20. #20
    Craftsman
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    Canít go wrong with a Tiguan.


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  21. #21
    Quote Originally Posted by Captain Morgan View Post
    Sounds like the ideal use case for a Honda Jazz or Civic, reasonable space, performance & servicing costs, & being a Honda it wonít go wrong.

    If bigger is needed add the CRV to the mix.
    My mother has a Jazz and like every Japanese car Iíve ever sat in the seats are incredibly uncomfortable - I canít sit in it for more than 15 mins without getting a sore back. However Iím tall and heavy so I donít think Iím what the designers had in mind!


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  22. #22
    Lexus all day long, choose whichever model, boring, economic, all of the toys, and will never go wrong

  23. #23
    Master
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    Quote Originally Posted by RobDad View Post
    My mother has a Jazz and like every Japanese car Iíve ever sat in the seats are incredibly uncomfortable - I canít sit in it for more than 15 mins without getting a sore back. However Iím tall and heavy so I donít think Iím what the designers had in mind!


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    Interesting, we have Civics mk8 & 10 and have driven the Hook of Holland to Zell am See and back in each multiple times and not been a problem and Iím no racing snake.

  24. #24
    Grand Master hogthrob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RobDad View Post
    My mother has a Jazz and like every Japanese car Iíve ever sat in the seats are incredibly uncomfortable - I canít sit in it for more than 15 mins without getting a sore back. However Iím tall and heavy so I donít think Iím what the designers had in mind!
    I'm tall and heavy, and the seats in my Jazz are fine. They're great town cars (if you can accept the image), and you can fit an insane amount of stuff in them. Slightly out of their comfort zone on motorways.

  25. #25
    Grand Master hogthrob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pugster View Post
    skoda octavia vrs - runs forever, plenty of room and moves pretty quick.
    A Skoda VRS is the natural progression from a Corsa with loud exhaust and cheap alloys.

  26. #26
    Master
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    Mondeo estate, or a Volvo estate would be my suggestions

  27. #27
    In the unlikely event you decide you want a Jazz, theyíre so boring they would be a total juxtaposition to your other cars, Iíve got a very low mileage one Iím about to sell on behalf of my mother in law, weíre not too far from you. Let me know if you want more info.

  28. #28
    Grand Master hogthrob's Avatar
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    Fun fact about a Jazz:

    Maximum power - Output - Horsepower : 90 PS or 89 bhp or 66 kW @ 6000 rpm
    Maximum torque : 114 Nm or 84 lb.ft @ 4900 rpm


    You cab even feel it come 'on cam', though I'm not claiming it turns into a rocket ship. I doubt many of them have gone over 3000 rpm.

  29. #29
    I had a a Jazz as a hire car once and with four adults it really gave me a scare up Sutton Bank as I thought we had asked too much of it. It crawled, but did make it in the end.

    From a practical point of view an estate or maybe a full size MPV would suit best. I was looking at some Golf and Jetta estates, but they are more expensive than the Passats, so that will need further research. It looks like all of the traditionally "cheap" cars are now more expensive on the used market than their bigger or more luxurious counterparts.

    I really like the idea of an old Lexus and Saab though, but maybe I'm letting my enthusiasm overrule my reason as I don't need more toys.

    If I am being entirely honest, this is as much of a fun endeavour as it is practical. The practical side is just an excuse to justify doing it. I do want an old nail that I can park on the street without having to circle the carpark three times looking for just the right spot, and throw rubbish in the back without having to insulate the boot first...

  30. #30
    Civic estate/tourer ? I've had a Civic 2012 1.8 from new (albeit the hatch) and 90k later it still runs like clockwork ..cheap to run, great mpg, very practical....the estate version is meant to be cavernous

  31. #31
    Quote Originally Posted by adigra View Post
    I had a a Jazz as a hire car once and with four adults it really gave me a scare up Sutton Bank as I thought we had asked too much of it. It crawled, but did make it in the end.

    From a practical point of view an estate or maybe a full size MPV would suit best. I was looking at some Golf and Jetta estates, but they are more expensive than the Passats, so that will need further research. It looks like all of the traditionally "cheap" cars are now more expensive on the used market than their bigger or more luxurious counterparts.

    I really like the idea of an old Lexus and Saab though, but maybe I'm letting my enthusiasm overrule my reason as I don't need more toys.

    If I am being entirely honest, this is as much of a fun endeavour as it is practical. The practical side is just an excuse to justify doing it. I do want an old nail that I can park on the street without having to circle the carpark three times looking for just the right spot, and throw rubbish in the back without having to insulate the boot first...
    I had an RX400 and then two RX450's all new, did about 100k in each, none of them missed a beat, the only downside is they are all CVT's

  32. #32
    Master
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    Quote Originally Posted by pugster View Post
    skoda octavia vrs - runs forever, plenty of room and moves pretty quick.
    Not even slightly boring!

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  33. #33
    Master
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    Quote Originally Posted by wileeeeeey View Post
    Iíve had three Smart fortwos, I love them, but you do get bullied in them - no question.
    Yes, but so much fun leaving them behind in the twisties after they have assumed you cannot drive. They still come haring back on the straights though.

    Nobody lets me out of a junction in the smart or the Porsche it seems. I have got used to waiting.

  34. #34
    Oh, I should've mentioned, it really should be an automatic of some kind. Both my cars are manual, so I really want the polar opposite.

    Regarding the Smart. I drove it a lot and I found it amusing when people tried to bully me on the road, but I am an ugly, large weightlifter, so as soon as they see me they do that thing where they stare at some point in the distance to avoid eye contact. It's quite different when you're a woman. A couple of final instances really rattled her as both times they were determined to overtake her where there was no room and nearly ran her off the road. One of them was after she overtook them on the bypass, which obviously was such a threat to his manhood he undertook her on the roundabout from the turning lane. After that she said she wanted something fast and aggressive.

    Both my Porsches are old, so even the newer one gets let in at junctions, etc., but the old one, the 930, everyone smiles and lets me in. It's like some kinda magic pass being in that car.

  35. #35
    Master thieuster's Avatar
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    Older Saabs... I'm a Saab 95V4 owner and member of the Dutch Saab forum. This forum covers all types of Saabs. I noticed that the type of Saab (1.9 TiD 9-3 station) that we owned around '08 - '12 is getting long in the tooth these days. Lots of '... this warning light comes on...' or '... what does code XXX mean?' type of questions.

  36. #36
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    Dacia Duster

    See the 86 page thread on Pistonheads entitled - Dacia Duster, 999cc of Throbbing Fun

  37. #37
    Craftsman
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    Volvo XC70 D5

  38. #38
    Quote Originally Posted by hogthrob View Post
    I'm tall and heavy, and the seats in my Jazz are fine. They're great town cars (if you can accept the image), and you can fit an insane amount of stuff in them. Slightly out of their comfort zone on motorways.
    Oh I agree they are well packaged and very practical, just find the seats lack support (which Iíve never found in any of the Volvos and VWís Iíve owned ) - might just be my back back then?


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  39. #39
    SC has a Golf GTI mk5 for sale. Looks very nice.

  40. #40
    Quote Originally Posted by prexelor View Post
    SC has a Golf GTI mk5 for sale. Looks very nice.
    Looks great, but needs someone to take care of it. Far too nice a car for my needs.

  41. #41
    Master
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    I have a Civic estate, its boring , utterly reliable and cavernous.

    Interestingly, will probably also be selling it in a couple of months...

  42. #42
    Master brigant's Avatar
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    Mini Countryman All 4 2.0 ltr'/.

    Got mine 2011 55000 miles on it.

    Had it remapped ( £250) now 178 bhp. Loads of room, sticks to road like glue and is faster than Mini Cooper S

  43. #43
    Master
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    Honda Civic, changed the spark plugs on my 2014 Civic last year because I thought Iíd better change something, only had pads, oil and filters.

  44. #44
    Grand Master hogthrob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maris View Post
    Honda Civic, changed the spark plugs on my 2014 Civic last year because I thought Iíd better change something, only had pads, oil and filters.
    Worth pointing out that post-2006 Civics have a timing chain, which is a big plus.

  45. #45
    Subaru Outback

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  46. #46
    Journeyman DONGinsler's Avatar
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    Based on your 3 current cars

    Your definition of a half decent watch may be far removed from others definition.

    Any American UK models?

    Ford Fiesta 4 door



    Or the ST model

    DON

  47. #47
    It's funny how this thread seems to keep up with my own meandering through the classifieds. Subaru Outback was my latest rabbit hole.

    What I'd really like is this: https://www.pistonheads.com/buy/listing/13060759 but I think I'd probably end up loving it and it would become just another car to take care of. I tend to anthropomorphise cars and end up feeling bad neglecting them.

    As for the half decent watch, I realise that is kind of open to interpretation, but I was thinking of something like Marinemaster 300, coincidentally one of my favourite watches. But let's say £3k-ish.

  48. #48
    Master
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    You would have to look after that Merc. It would be a waste to not do so and therefore wonít meet what you need from the car!

    Buy it anyway!

  49. #49
    Journeyman
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    I'd suggest getting a Ford. They're relatively inexpensive, reliable (IME), cheap to maintain, nobody wants to steal them. Come in lots of shapes and sizes and levels of trim. I like the Mondeo personally.

  50. #50
    Master murkeywaters's Avatar
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    Octavia diesel estate, I love mine for just being so practical and good at what it does plus I donít worry where I park, good on tax for an oil burner and cheap insurance.

    If that has sold it to you then Iíll agree on a straight swap with the 930

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