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Thread: Things you'll never understand

  1. #101
    Master thieuster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jaytip View Post
    Gerald talking (Clarksonís Farm)
    Ha! We have a subtitled version.

    Apart from that: all of the above. And to add one: owners with 60K cars not using their indicators. Yes, youíve paid for those too.

  2. #102
    Craftsman Halitosis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by classics View Post
    Not use this service myself, but my last 2 trips to Australia via Hong Kong has left my suitcase with a crack, 2 dents and the usual scruff marks.
    Then your suitcase did the job for which it was designed by protecting its contents.


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  3. #103
    Grand Master RustyBin5's Avatar
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    Expecting more than getting knocked out in the group stages as a Scotland fan. Donít understand why Iím surprised by it every time.

  4. #104
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    Gravity and why weíre not sucked off this rock into the vacuum of space.

    The natural history museum has a massive billion year old meteorite in a glass case as if itís not going to last longer than the museum and us as a species

    People who have the TV on but want to hold a conversation


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  5. #105
    Quote Originally Posted by greenandblack View Post

    People who have the TV on but want to hold a conversation


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    Yes! Permanent background TV. Why? You go to their house and they leave the TV on while you talk. Soft music is background, TV isn't.

  6. #106
    Grand Master RustyBin5's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jdh1 View Post
    Yes! Permanent background TV. Why? You go to their house and they leave the TV on while you talk. Soft music is background, TV isn't.
    It fills what some perceive as awkward silences between conversations. I donít understand it but Iím sure thatís the reasoning

  7. #107
    Man bags. I mean, really?
    Looks like youíre holding it for your Nan.


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  8. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jdh1 View Post
    Yes! Permanent background TV. Why? You go to their house and they leave the TV on while you talk. Soft music is background, TV isn't.
    I have a close friend who cannot hold a conversation if the tv is on, he will glance at it & become hooked on whatever is on, usually a cartoon for his kid. Itís really freaky to watch him just zone out entirely.


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  9. #109
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    Quote Originally Posted by David_D View Post
    Dog owners who can happily pick up dog shit without vomiting.
    Every time I see some picking it up I just wonder why youíd want to do that. I donít get pets though, well, maybe for those who donít live alone.

  10. #110
    Grand Master wileeeeeey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jdh1 View Post
    Yes! Permanent background TV. Why? You go to their house and they leave the TV on while you talk. Soft music is background, TV isn't.
    Whenever I'm on the phone to my mum I can hear the TV just as loud as I can hear her. It's infuriating.

    Each time I tell her "can you just turn the TV off if you're on the phone?" she turns it down a bit, says it's off, I can still hear it and she claims "well you must have it on in your house because I'm looking at a black screen".

    The chances of me watching border force, can't pay we'll take it away, or Irish documentaries is absolutely zero so you're lying and the TV is still on!

  11. #111
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    In the days before phones being connected to cars, my wife used to answer the phone without turning the radio off. Used to drive me wild trying to talk with her.


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  12. #112
    Grand Master wileeeeeey's Avatar
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    How my wife uses so much toilet roll. Really don't get it, never will. I've tried asking why so much but immediately wished I never spoke.

  13. #113
    Grand Master RustyBin5's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chinese_Alan View Post
    Every time I see some picking it up I just wonder why youíd want to do that. I donít get pets though, well, maybe for those who donít live alone.
    Do you think the same when you see a kid getting a happy changed?

  14. #114
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    Quote Originally Posted by GraniteQuarry View Post
    Starbucks. There, said it.
    I agree!

    'Can i take a name for the order'?

    i don't want my name written on the side of a coffee cup and im not your mate.

    'Latte for Jon'

    just give me a number...

    ill go to Costa instead

  15. #115
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    Religion.

  16. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mj2k View Post
    I have a close friend who cannot hold a conversation if the tv is on, he will glance at it & become hooked on whatever is on, usually a cartoon for his kid. Itís really freaky to watch him just zone out entirely.
    Iím quite like that to be honest, canít multitask and the tv is funnier than you so..

    People who clean up after their dogsÖ then throw it in a hedge. Maybe theyíve misunderstood compostible poo bags

  17. #117
    Grand Master wileeeeeey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenandblack View Post
    People who clean up after their dogsÖ then throw it in a hedge. Maybe theyíve misunderstood compostible poo bags
    Round here in the forest they pick it up, bag it, then hang the bag off a branch. Pigs.

  18. #118
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    So many things, but a burning question is why people have tattoos on bit of their body which they cannot see without the use of a mirror (if at all). Expensive, painful and a bit naff (like tramp stamps for example).

    And why I struggle to break 80 at golf.

    Whoever does not know how to hit the nail on the head should be asked not to hit it at all.
    Friedrich Nietzsche


  19. #119
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    Quote Originally Posted by wileeeeeey View Post
    How my wife uses so much toilet roll. Really don't get it, never will. I've tried asking why so much but immediately wished I never spoke.
    Itís better than not using enough.

  20. #120
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    Why do people name watches with names like Batman Pepsi Kermit Hulk...ffs you are grown men.

  21. #121
    Quote Originally Posted by Toddy View Post
    Religion.
    - because there are things we don't understand yet...

    in most SciFi novels, and I read a lot of them, humanity and most other races have moved on from deity/religion/creator/controller

    Some sci-fi is based around individuals, and sometimes sentient computers, controlling other populations like a deity "pulling the strings"


    There is an amazing novel where somebody is hosting Hell in a computer simulation. You get uploaded there after your death. A ?fake religion concept.

    anyhow, fiction.

  22. #122
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    Things you'll never understand

    Quote Originally Posted by wileeeeeey View Post
    Round here in the forest they pick it up, bag it, then hang the bag off a branch. Pigs.
    Same here. Usually at local beauty spots. Why go to the effort of bagging it just to sling it in a nearby tree?
    Can any dog owner here explain it to me?
    Last edited by Bobbyf; 23rd June 2021 at 20:10.

  23. #123
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chinese_Alan View Post
    Every time I see some picking it up I just wonder why youíd want to do that. I donít get pets though, well, maybe for those who donít live alone.
    Itís odd. I used to walk my in laws dog and hated picking up - to the point I designed a very effective scooper thing (should probably patent it).
    However, now we have a dog, I donít mind picking up his poo.

    Funny thing is though that I still donít like picking up for any dog other than mine. Some dirty bastard let their dog take a dump right in front of the local war memorial and I was gagging like a goodun when I got rid of it.

  24. #124
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Curta View Post
    I love those flights in far flung destinations where is is commonplace to do this on landing. I always join in enthusiastically and yell, "Thank-you pilots for doing your jobs and not killing us". Strange how my luggage is always last on the carousel.
    Just about every flight I have taken in and out of Dublin airport, the round of applause upon landing totally baffles me. I mean. WTAF??

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  25. #125
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    Quote Originally Posted by adigra View Post
    People who drive 45mph on a derestricted clear country road, but then continue at the same speed through a 30mph village.
    This^^^^^^ .

  26. #126
    Quote Originally Posted by Robsmck View Post
    Just about every flight I have taken in and out of Dublin airport, the round of applause upon landing totally baffles me. I mean. WTAF??
    Donít fly Ryanair then. 🤣

  27. #127
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    Why are we entertained on the big and small screen by themes revolving around the most abhorrent act of murdering a human being?


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  28. #128
    Grand Master RustyBin5's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mjc1216 View Post
    Why do people name watches with names like Batman Pepsi Kermit Hulk...ffs you are grown men.
    And women

  29. #129
    Grand Master RustyBin5's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobbyf View Post
    Same here. Usually at local beauty spots. Why go to the effort of bagging it just to sling it in a nearby tree?
    Can any dog owner here explain it to me?
    Nope - these people are just moronic.

  30. #130
    Master blackal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mjc1216 View Post
    Why do people name watches with names like Batman Pepsi Kermit Hulk...ffs you are grown men.
    I can't bring myself to utter them - they are so 'twee'.

    (I'll stretch to Seiko "Bullhead", but that's about it)

  31. #131
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Doc View Post
    - because there are things we don't understand yet...

    in most SciFi novels, and I read a lot of them, humanity and most other races have moved on from deity/religion/creator/controller

    Some sci-fi is based around individuals, and sometimes sentient computers, controlling other populations like a deity "pulling the strings"


    There is an amazing novel where somebody is hosting Hell in a computer simulation. You get uploaded there after your death. A ?fake religion concept.

    anyhow, fiction.
    The simulation scenario is quite mainstream now as it is a logical assumption based on the way technology is advancing.

    I won't say more here as it's the G&D. It's a rabbit hole that is worth exploring.

  32. #132
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobbyf View Post
    Same here. Usually at local beauty spots. Why go to the effort of bagging it just to sling it in a nearby tree?
    Can any dog owner here explain it to me?
    Quote Originally Posted by RustyBin5 View Post
    Nope - these people are just moronic.
    I don't mind saying I do this. Albeit always retrieve the bag. My dogs have a preference of sh**ing just past the poo bin, normally a few minutes walk past. I can't be bothered to double back. Plus I prefer to have both hands free for the walk ahead (normally another hour or so) where both hands are needed to ensure I can control the dogs with a whistle, treats, etc... At the end of the dog walk on my return home, I collect the bag and pop it in the bin as I pass it again.

    For those who intend on leaving it hanging in the tree/bush forever, I have no idea.

  33. #133
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    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Smith View Post
    "Mr. Pink : I don't tip because society says I have to. All right, if someone deserves a tip, if they really put forth an effort, I'll give them something a little something extra. But this tipping automatically, it's for the birds"

    I agree with Mr Pink. If someone in 'Service' does an exceptional (imo) job then I'm happy to tip. I think service in this country is generally rubbish, they ask you if everything is ok then run off quick in case you have got something to complain about.
    No tipping in Italy, but then there's no sign of service either.

  34. #134
    Referring to a football team as if you play for themÖíwe played really wellÖí no you didnít you were sat on your backside in front of the TV. Youíre no more a part of the team than my mother in laws cat!

  35. #135
    Grand Master snowman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeanST150 View Post
    I don't mind saying I do this. Albeit always retrieve the bag. My dogs have a preference of sh**ing just past the poo bin, normally a few minutes walk past. I can't be bothered to double back. Plus I prefer to have both hands free for the walk ahead (normally another hour or so) where both hands are needed to ensure I can control the dogs with a whistle, treats, etc... At the end of the dog walk on my return home, I collect the bag and pop it in the bin as I pass it again.

    For those who intend on leaving it hanging in the tree/bush forever, I have no idea.
    My daughter now has a couple of dogs and when out walking with her a while ago, I was horrified to see her hang the bag on a branch, but she explained it's common for people to do this and then collect them and dispose of them on the way back, which she did.

    I guess some people either don't bother or simply forget (or take another route unexpectedly), but it's clear that not everyone does it to recover it later, but it has changed my view slightly on the practice.

    M
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  36. #136
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    Quote Originally Posted by dougair View Post
    Referring to a football team as if you play for them…’we played really well…’ no you didn’t you were sat on your backside in front of the TV. You’re no more a part of the team than my mother in laws cat!
    I agree, I just don’t get this.
    I have a mate who does this all the time. He is not exactly the picture of health, he would pull a muscle running for a bus. Yet it’s always “we were great, we were robbed, we have the best racist thugs”
    Last edited by Sinnlover; 24th June 2021 at 13:50.

  37. #137
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Doc View Post
    - because there are things we don't understand yet...

    in most SciFi novels, and I read a lot of them, humanity and most other races have moved on from deity/religion/creator/controller

    Some sci-fi is based around individuals, and sometimes sentient computers, controlling other populations like a deity "pulling the strings"


    There is an amazing novel where somebody is hosting Hell in a computer simulation. You get uploaded there after your death. A ?fake religion concept.

    anyhow, fiction.
    Sorry to go off topic but could you recommend a few of your favourite SF authors please? I like good Sci-Fi but struggle to find the wheat amongst all the chaff. TIA

  38. #138
    Grand Master snowman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jonnyv View Post
    I agree!

    'Can i take a name for the order'?

    i don't want my name written on the side of a coffee cup and im not your mate.

    'Latte for Jon'

    just give me a number...

    ill go to Costa instead
    I go to Costa instead, because they actually sell coffee!

    To me, most of Starbuck's drinks seem to be designed for children...

    To be fair, Starbucks isn't even taken seriously by most Americans

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  39. #139
    Grand Master snowman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RustyBin5 View Post
    And women
    Ok, Batgirl, Miss Piggy, etc...

    Quote Originally Posted by greenandblack View Post
    I’m quite like that to be honest, can’t multitask and the tv is funnier than you so..
    You must miss the daily COVID briefing...

    M
    Last edited by snowman; 24th June 2021 at 09:37.
    Breitling Cosmonaute 809 - What's not to like?

  40. #140
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    Why do people feel the need to change straps on their watches? Always baffles me. I buy a watch with the type of strap I like and just wear it. Simple.

  41. #141
    Quote Originally Posted by Jonnyv View Post
    I agree!

    'Can i take a name for the order'?

    i don't want my name written on the side of a coffee cup and im not your mate.

    'Latte for Jon'

    just give me a number...

    ill go to Costa instead
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ow7Ht44ehjc

  42. #142
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    Quote Originally Posted by wileeeeeey View Post
    Round here in the forest they pick it up, bag it, then hang the bag off a branch. Pigs.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bobbyf View Post
    Same here. Usually at local beauty spots. Why go to the effort of bagging it just to sling it in a nearby tree?
    Can any dog owner here explain it to me?
    Quote Originally Posted by RustyBin5 View Post
    Nope - these people are just moronic.
    We call them 'shit baubles'. On a walk recently we saw a large bush completely decorated with them, I forgot to take a pic.

  43. #143
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    Unfortunately my favourite films need as much gratuitous blood, gore and violence as possible!!

    Quote Originally Posted by ALindsay View Post
    Why are we entertained on the big and small screen by themes revolving around the most abhorrent act of murdering a human being?


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  44. #144
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    Quote Originally Posted by snowman View Post
    she explained it's common for people to do this and then collect them and dispose of them on the way back, which she did.

    I guess some people either don't bother or simply forget (or take another route unexpectedly), but it's clear that not everyone does it to recover it later, but it has changed my view slightly on the practice.
    I suspect for every person who does the right thing, 10 donít.

    How do you know which is ďyoursĒ??

  45. #145
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    People who think itís ok to talk / use phones at the cinema (a distant memory at this point but soon to be a problem again).


    Quote Originally Posted by OldHooky View Post
    Man bags. I mean, really?
    Looks like youíre holding it for your Nan.
    People who donít understand man bags ;-) I have more things to carry than will fit into my pockets, including an iPad. What am I supposed to do with them? Use a shopping trolley? Buy a briefcase so I can look more like a man from the 1950s and avoid being compared to women from the 1950s by people still living in the 1950s?

  46. #146
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brighty View Post
    A brilliant piece from a brilliant entertainer.


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  47. #147
    I don't understand why my wife thinks my fingernails are fine when they are attached to my body, but somehow the ends of them turn into horrible poisonous spikes the second I clip them off.

  48. #148
    Quote Originally Posted by DMC102 View Post
    Sorry to go off topic but could you recommend a few of your favourite SF authors please? I like good Sci-Fi but struggle to find the wheat amongst all the chaff. TIA
    Iain M. Banks
    Alastair Reynolds
    Greg Bear
    Yoon ha Lee
    Roger Levy
    Anything from the SF Masterworks series. Filter them by the blurb on the back.
    Asimov and Arthur C Clarke obvs, they really are that good.
    Neal Stephenson - anyone who can begin a chapter with the words "Five thousand years later....." I'd OK in my book!

    I like Hard Sci Fi, no dragons or goblins

  49. #149
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    Try Olaf Stapledon, Last and First Men (which is in the SF Masterworks series, it's far better imo than Star Maker)

    This...

    Quote Originally Posted by The Doc View Post
    Anything from the SF Masterworks series. Filter them by the blurb on the back.
    Asimov and Arthur C Clarke obvs, they really are that good.

  50. #150
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    Why when it's a round of 16 do England always get Germany, Portugal or if World Cup Argentina. Surely we should only get them once every 15 tournaments which is once every 60 years!

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