1. When taking delivery of a box of high level fake Rolex, remove your real name and home address before distribution.
2. When rumbled by a handsome jeweller and being followed by his team, be clear when you tell your associate to "Get rid of the the box." It is embarrassing to confess under interview that the idiot was meant to get rid of just the box, not the incriminating contents as well.
3. When ditching a box of knock-off Rolex with your details on it, try not to do so right in front of an off-duty policeman.
4. When waddling through the streets of Chester in the slowest and most farcical pursuit ever, do not try to lose your pursuers by jumping over the side of a canal bridge. As you fall and hurt your leg on the inclined bank of the canal, they may not be entirely sympathetic as they saunter down the handy steps adjacent.
5. Do not declare that you "have the best brief in Liverpool" and state that as a result you will never be fingered, lest both you and he look silly when you subsequently are.
6. Do not ask solicitor to write to the jeweller and demand your passport back, claiming it had been taken from you, when you yourself left it behind in your panic to scarper before the police arrived. It will by that time be in the safe hands of Cheshire Constabulary.
7. Do not call your hapless buddies in the getaway Jaguar to arrange urgent transport if the pursuing team are right behind you. They will thus be party to the arrangements and ready to photograph both accomplices and vehicle upon arrival.
Two have pleaded guilty, one behind bars as I write.