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Thread: Things that have improved my life

  1. #101
    Master murkeywaters's Avatar
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    Great thread and I'm taking some inspiration as parts of my life need it.

    Like others here my dog, we have a very close bond and until you click with an animal like that its very hard to describe, the loyalty and happiness they show for such simple things in life is grounding.

    I used to love the gym and short fast runs 20 years ago, I felt great, was very positive and had the spice for life.
    Now, apart from the daily dog walk my exercise is low and I'm starting to feel it, add in death of my dad a few years ago, difficult business break up, some other mid life problems and I need to turn it round as you can feel a bit like your in a whirlpool getting sucked in further.

    With that said I left full time employment 11 years ago to run my own business, since then I have engineered a path that I only earn money at things I enjoy doing.
    I spent too many years standing in the same place doing the same thing watching old guys getting scared to retire, simply work and their work friends was their life and walking away from that scared them, they always said once you get to 40 your here for life as its only 25 years until retirement!

    Keep the positivity coming, if your on the fence about leaving full time employment just give it a go - you can always earn a few quid but you can never get your time back.

  2. #102
    Quote Originally Posted by AlphaOmega View Post
    Can you share any experiences? Think it might help many posters who don't post much but are possibly suffering in silence.

    I mean the SSRIs not the guacamole. Although guacamole stories would be interesting too.
    Apologies for jumping in from a standing start; since coming back from the Balkans in 1996, I was a horrible person to know. Mood swings, selfish, ignorant, you name it, it had my picture on it. Relationships came and went, often traumatically.

    I started a new career, but went at it like a bull in a China shop, to everyone’s detriment, but then met my now wife. Treated her like rubbish at first, Bob only knows why she stayed, but she did, and maybe she saw something I couldn’t. She pointed me towards Combat Stress who took me on, diagnosed me and medicated me. That was in 2013.

    I now take Sertraline and Amitriptyline nightly but it’s flattened me right out. I’m now married and in a specialism within my profession that I love.

    I suppose what this Magnificent Octopus is getting at, very tangentially, is that meds can be the making of a recovery; some see “pills” as a Bad Thing, when used correctly they can be a godsend. So to answer the thread title;

    a. My wife

    b. Combat Stress

    c. Sertraline and Amitriptyline.

    Be well everyone.

    Ian

  3. #103
    Grand Master ryanb741's Avatar
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    Work.

    I've been dealt a pretty rough hand in life which mean I have to spend a lot of time and money just keeping the family afloat/sane/alive and having a job that is challenging enables me to escape from the intensity and pressure of home life and focus on something else. If I didnt have a job I dread to think what I'd do

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    Last edited by ryanb741; 7th May 2021 at 20:02.

  4. #104
    Grand Master AlphaOmega's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by G10 for Men View Post
    Be well everyone.

    Ian
    Thanks for writing a very inspiring post.

    Hopefully, no matter what those who read this thread are going through, they'll see that by talking to others who can help, it's possible to deal with a truly challenging period of life and get through it.

    By the way, love your forum name. Sounds like an aftershave that would no doubt work well at an AD!

    All the best

    AO

  5. #105
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    I could list a lot of things, but without doubt the thing that has had the biggest impact recently is moving back to the beach. It's a minute walk from my door and I'm down there most days, often watching the sunrise from my paddleboard. The difference it's made to my life is huge.

  6. #106
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    Quote Originally Posted by adrianw View Post
    I got married three years ago, lived alone for 15 years, I think it has improved my life.
    I got divorced from my bitch ex-wife this year. Best thing that's ever happened to me and has improved my life ten fold.

    Never again will I get married or be in a relationship that isn't temporary.

    Swings and roundabouts. :0)

  7. #107
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    Quote Originally Posted by Filterlab View Post
    I got divorced from my bitch ex-wife this year. Best thing that's ever happened to me and has improved my life ten fold.

    Never again will I get married or be in a relationship that isn't temporary.

    Swings and roundabouts. :0)
    Ying & Yang.

  8. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gavbaz View Post
    Ying & Yang.
    Indeed. One man's mess is another man's masterpiece.

  9. #109
    Master vRSG60's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Filterlab View Post
    I got divorced from my bitch ex-wife this year. Best thing that's ever happened to me and has improved my life ten fold.

    Never again will I get married or be in a relationship that isn't temporary.

    Swings and roundabouts. :0)
    Apart from the death of my father when I was 8 every single turmoil in my life has involved a woman. Never again.


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  10. #110
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    They are nothing but trouble in my opinion.

  11. #111
    Grand Master AlphaOmega's Avatar
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    Bluetooth headphones.

    Hour-long zoom calls can be spent doing something productive in another room. Or the garden.

  12. #112
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    The wife and son. Financial independence by 40. A lovely home in sunny climes and a swimming pool. Regular exercise.
    Last edited by Passenger; 20th August 2021 at 11:31.

  13. #113
    This thread has been both an enjoyable and thought-provoking read, so here's my contribution of three of the most significant things that have improved my life.

    The wife.
    Best thing ever. She completely attenuated my previous lifestyle and greatly improved my outlook on so many things in life. She really is the wind in my sails and I owe her so much.
    Coincidently, she also introduced me to owning:

    Dogs.
    SWMBO arrived into my life accompanied with her cocker spaniel and since then we've never been dogless, almost always spaniels. For the last two decades we've also fostered and adopted dogs, both options have given us a great range of emotional rollercoasters but the reward of taking on rescue dogs and then turning them around has been the most rewarding experience. Our two current girls have been the most challenging of all as they both had truly terrible lives since puppyhood, but in the six months since they arrived they have completely flourished. There's still more work to do with them, but it's such a pleasure to be able to regularly take them out to...

    Beaches.
    Anything to do with the sea captivates me: either on it, under it or alongside it makes me very happy. We chose to live where we do based on the proximity of beaches and I get to one most days. Gales, rain, snow or sunshine doesn't matter, I just love being on a beach. Equally, being in a boat or diving under the sea improves my spirits and well-being.

    Looking forward to reading more in this thread.

    R
    Ignorance breeds Fear. Fear breeds Hatred. Hatred breeds Ignorance. Break the chain.

  14. #114
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    At the beginning of 2015 a friend on another forum suggested an online cycling club, where we would share our riding experiences and mileages. A bit like the cycling thread here.

    I'd cycled only very occasionally over the previous few years. I set myself a target of 750 miles in 2015. I ended up doing 2702 that year, and to date I've done 29,385 miles since Jan 2015. Life changing.

  15. #115
    I should say my wife and son but for some reason I’m going to say my dog, Lola. Hasn't move from my side for 11 years


  16. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by AlphaOmega View Post
    Bluetooth headphones.

    Hour-long zoom calls can be spent doing something productive in another room. Or the garden.
    My Bose ones only give me a really short distance from my laptop before they break up. Something weird going on in my house as perfect long distance outside.

    Equally if I’m at my desk, they interfere with my mouse & keyboard which are BT too.

    My echo buds seem to beep like call waiting if using them for teams.

    All annoying when wasted time on calls.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  17. #117
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    Quote Originally Posted by awright101 View Post
    I should say my wife and son but for some reason I’m going to say my dog, Lola. Hasn't move from my side for 11 years

    I know the feeling. Lola looks a cracker.

  18. #118
    Grand Master AlphaOmega's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mj2k View Post
    My Bose ones only give me a really short distance from my laptop before they break up. Something weird going on in my house as perfect long distance outside.

    Equally if I’m at my desk, they interfere with my mouse & keyboard which are BT too.

    My echo buds seem to beep like call waiting if using them for teams.

    All annoying when wasted time on calls.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    I bought mine from SC. They're Jabra and worth the extra as they can go about 30 yards. They also have noise cancelling. Definitely recommended.

    ^Fantastic pic by the way.

  19. #119
    Grand Master sundial's Avatar
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    Many years ago resumed studying aged 23 years ... two years later after 3 evenings/week classes and much weekend study acquired some decent qualifications which enabled me to be a 'problem solver' (CV +ve) and progress my career ... and help others on a voluntary basis.
    Last edited by sundial; 22nd August 2021 at 23:07.
    "Well they would say that ... wouldn't they!"

  20. #120
    Grand Master Mr Curta's Avatar
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    Tapenade
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  21. #121
    Master ozzyb123's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Curta View Post
    Tapenade
    Home made??


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  22. #122
    Grand Master Mr Curta's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ozzyb123 View Post
    Home made??
    Yes, a vegetarian recipe.
    Don't just do something, sit there. - TNH

  23. #123
    Master Wolfie's Avatar
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    Wife
    Kids
    Dogs
    Walking
    Running / exercise
    Semi interesting job
    Leicester City

    I love all of them and my relationship with them has improved my life immeasurably …. They could all equally make an appearance in a’what pisses you off’ thread

    Anything that improves your life often takes a bit of commitment and work…. Many times in life you get out what you put in…

    Never stop putting in (fnar fnar)

  24. #124
    Grand Master hogthrob's Avatar
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    This forum. It's given me contact with all sorts of people I'd never normally meet. I don't personally know any of you, but I love you guys.


    ...and of course, thanks to Eddie (Ł30 donated to the fundraiser for invoking his name).

  25. #125
    Grand Master Saint-Just's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Curta View Post
    Yes, a vegetarian recipe.
    You mean no anchovies?
    I need to retreat to my safe space to cope with this…
    'Against stupidity, the gods themselves struggle in vain' - Schiller.

  26. #126
    Grand Master Mr Curta's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saint-Just View Post
    You mean no anchovies?
    I need to retreat to my safe space to cope with this…
    I've never been a purist and enjoy experimenting with recipes which tends to happen when you live in places where some ingredients aren't readily available. It did make it fairly easy to adapt to an animal free diet.
    Don't just do something, sit there. - TNH

  27. #127
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    Semi retirement has taken a lot of the 'everyday' stress away

  28. #128
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    Yoga. Physically and mentally has improved my life more than any other sport/exercise.

  29. #129
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    I live a relatively simple, straightforward life.

    By design, not by chance.

    Anything potentially stressful or toxic, is cut loose.

    I’m grateful for what I have, rather than what I have not.

    I highly recommend it.

  30. #130
    Grand Master Passenger's Avatar
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    Cheese.

  31. #131
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    I hate to say it but varifocals.
    Im 43 and my sight went to pot as soon as I hit 40. Its things further away that blur out for me but prior to vari's my glasses were up down up down up down whenever I had to switch between reading phone/book and seeing anything else.

  32. #132
    Master subseastu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Essexman View Post
    Yoga. Physically and mentally has improved my life more than any other sport/exercise.
    I've toyed with the idea of this in the past but never got round to doing anything about it apart from finding out there are numerous different types and getting a book or two. Do you have any pointers for sources? Do you use youtube etc as I found the books a bit, well naff to follow. I'm as stiff as a board (oo-er) so would need a basic starting point

  33. #133
    Quote Originally Posted by subseastu View Post
    I've toyed with the idea of this in the past but never got round to doing anything about it apart from finding out there are numerous different types and getting a book or two. Do you have any pointers for sources? Do you use youtube etc as I found the books a bit, well naff to follow. I'm as stiff as a board (oo-er) so would need a basic starting point
    I have a peloton bike and they have a great selection of yoga for all experience levels.

    You don’t need the bike or tread mill to use it as there is the digital platform that works on tablets or mobiles. That’s how I started and was very impressed. They also have Pilates and meditation which are very good.

    Pretty sure they have a months trial so nothing to lose.

    Oh and it works on Sky Tv and Amazon fire as well if you want a larger screen!


    Cheers, Shaun

  34. #134
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    Quote Originally Posted by subseastu View Post
    I've toyed with the idea of this in the past but never got round to doing anything about it apart from finding out there are numerous different types and getting a book or two. Do you have any pointers for sources? Do you use youtube etc as I found the books a bit, well naff to follow. I'm as stiff as a board (oo-er) so would need a basic starting point
    Good question. Firstly you do not have to be flexible to practice yoga. Worth repeating YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE FLEXIBLE TO PRACTICE YOGA. Neither do you need to be fit, if you can breath you can practice yoga.

    I would recommend finding a local class. The advantage of going to a class is the teacher will aid and advise you with getting the poses correct, not hurting yourself, and making modifications to a pose if required. Put your postcode into google followed by "yoga class" see what comes up. Sometimes you'll find classes in a church hall, school or local park.

    Yes there are many types, you may want to try a few classes if possible to see what suits you. Many people start with traditional "Hatha" classes. But it depends what's available locally. At the end of the day it's all yoga.

    If class is not a option, youtube has many beginners videos. I understand "yoga with Adriene" is very popular. Another online is a step by step intro to Ashtanga yoga here https://onyouryogamat.com/lay13/

    I've been very lucky to find two good local teachers who are very helpful and don't mind answering my many questions. When I started it was (and still can be!) difficult. My first ever class we sat crossed legged for five minutes doing breathing exercises, but I couldn't sit cross legged as it hurt so much. Now I sit cross legged with my bum on a block. Childs pose hurt my legs, should be a resting pose! Now I use a block to place my head on in childs pose. Seated forward fold I couldn't reach my toes, now I use a strap around my feet. In fact I can reach my toes now, but not always, after three years of regular practice. After that first class the teacher asked my how it went, I explained I couldn't do it. She said that was good, then you will enjoy learning, see you next time. She was right.

  35. #135
    Master subseastu's Avatar
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    Thank you both for the replies. Time to get my arse in gear I think

    Quote Originally Posted by sjedwardz View Post
    I have a peloton bike and they have a great selection of yoga for all experience levels.

    You don’t need the bike or tread mill to use it as there is the digital platform that works on tablets or mobiles. That’s how I started and was very impressed. They also have Pilates and meditation which are very good.

    Pretty sure they have a months trial so nothing to lose.

    Oh and it works on Sky Tv and Amazon fire as well if you want a larger screen!


    Cheers, Shaun
    Quote Originally Posted by Essexman View Post
    Good question. Firstly you do not have to be flexible to practice yoga. Worth repeating YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE FLEXIBLE TO PRACTICE YOGA. Neither do you need to be fit, if you can breath you can practice yoga.

    I would recommend finding a local class. The advantage of going to a class is the teacher will aid and advise you with getting the poses correct, not hurting yourself, and making modifications to a pose if required. Put your postcode into google followed by "yoga class" see what comes up. Sometimes you'll find classes in a church hall, school or local park.

    Yes there are many types, you may want to try a few classes if possible to see what suits you. Many people start with traditional "Hatha" classes. But it depends what's available locally. At the end of the day it's all yoga.

    If class is not a option, youtube has many beginners videos. I understand "yoga with Adriene" is very popular. Another online is a step by step intro to Ashtanga yoga here https://onyouryogamat.com/lay13/

    I've been very lucky to find two good local teachers who are very helpful and don't mind answering my many questions. When I started it was (and still can be!) difficult. My first ever class we sat crossed legged for five minutes doing breathing exercises, but I couldn't sit cross legged as it hurt so much. Now I sit cross legged with my bum on a block. Childs pose hurt my legs, should be a resting pose! Now I use a block to place my head on in childs pose. Seated forward fold I couldn't reach my toes, now I use a strap around my feet. In fact I can reach my toes now, but not always, after three years of regular practice. After that first class the teacher asked my how it went, I explained I couldn't do it. She said that was good, then you will enjoy learning, see you next time. She was right.

  36. #136
    Motorbikes:
    Great new friends, great places, mindfulness

    Skateboarding:
    Pain and fear of death.

    Avoiding meat:
    No more diarrhoea, less migranes, good sleep

    Dogs:
    Great nightlife, eternal unconditioned love, new friends

    Sent from my ANE-LX1 using Tapatalk

  37. #137
    I enjoy meat and don’t get migraines otherwise your words ring true to me,!

  38. #138
    Quote Originally Posted by demonloop View Post
    I live a relatively simple, straightforward life.

    By design, not by chance.

    Anything potentially stressful or toxic, is cut loose.

    I’m grateful for what I have, rather than what I have not.

    I highly recommend it.
    Sounds like a solid plan

  39. #139
    Grand Master hogthrob's Avatar
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    A very small and limited improvement: getting a potato ricer. It's a revelation.

  40. #140
    Grand Master TaketheCannoli's Avatar
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    Buying quartz watches. I now have three that make up my whole collection; Grand Seiko, Longines Hydroconquest and a Scurfa. I realised recently that constantly obsessing about timekeeping and bezel alignment was, well, stupid. So I now don't have to worry and can enjoy my watches.

  41. #141
    Easy, motorbikes, bloody wish I’d done it years ago.


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  42. #142
    Grand Master Mr Curta's Avatar
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    Som tam
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  43. #143
    Motorbikes (28 years of joy now). Stopping smoking. My kids, as unconditional love is incredible to both give and receive. On the darker side, I cut my alcoholic, toxic, father out of my life a few months ago and it has made me happier than I would have thought, after decades of mental abuse and heartache.

  44. #144
    Quote Originally Posted by Matt8500 View Post
    Motorbikes (28 years of joy now). Stopping smoking. My kids, as unconditional love is incredible to both give and receive. On the darker side, I cut my alcoholic, toxic, father out of my life a few months ago and it has made me happier than I would have thought, after decades of mental abuse and heartache.
    Sorry to hear that about your Dad but glad you’ve got some peace

  45. #145
    Quote Originally Posted by awright101 View Post
    Sorry to hear that about your Dad but glad you’ve got some peace
    Thank you, my only regret is not doing it sooner. Loyalty is not always a good thing, it took him starting on my wife and trying to drag my kids into his games for me to make the break.

    Anyway this is a cheery thread and I am a positive person, so the upside is that it has made me more appreciative of my own kids, and how important it is to spend time with them just mucking around.

  46. #146
    Grand Master Neil.C's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TaketheCannoli View Post
    Buying quartz watches. I now have three that make up my whole collection; Grand Seiko, Longines Hydroconquest and a Scurfa. I realised recently that constantly obsessing about timekeeping and bezel alignment was, well, stupid. So I now don't have to worry and can enjoy my watches.
    You didn't actually have to worry in the first place.
    Cheers,
    Neil.

    My Speedmaster website:

    http://www.freewebs.com/neil271052

  47. #147
    Grand Master AlphaOmega's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Matt8500 View Post
    Thank you, my only regret is not doing it sooner. Loyalty is not always a good thing, it took him starting on my wife and trying to drag my kids into his games for me to make the break.

    Anyway this is a cheery thread and I am a positive person, so the upside is that it has made me more appreciative of my own kids, and how important it is to spend time with them just mucking around.
    That must have been very difficult.

    In a strange way, it can actually add a lot more positivity if we get to hear about ways people have removed negativity.

    Really sorry - can't imagine the anguish at making such a decision but you are not alone. I know of at least two other members who have talked about their experience of doing the same thing. They have talked of it on the forum of course, I wouldn't share private confidences shared by PM.

  48. #148
    Grand Master wileeeeeey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Matt8500 View Post
    Motorbikes (28 years of joy now). Stopping smoking. My kids, as unconditional love is incredible to both give and receive. On the darker side, I cut my alcoholic, toxic, father out of my life a few months ago and it has made me happier than I would have thought, after decades of mental abuse and heartache.
    In some ways I envy you. I have one alcoholic brother who I've cut out (haven't spoke in over a year, no plans to change that) and another who is pretty toxic "but means well". Tried to cut him out too and it was lovely for six months. It broke my mum's heart so I had to get back in touch.
    Last edited by wileeeeeey; 19th October 2021 at 18:18.

  49. #149
    Grand Master AlphaOmega's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear how difficult things are.

    I think we all have our breaking point.

    On the subject of things that have improved my life, listening to those older than me showing leadership and not givng up.

    In your 70s? So what. You're still a rock star.


  50. #150
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    three things from me;

    1. Trying out new things and if i dont enjoy them so be it, ive tried it once and not for me (rather than doing things that are in fashion at that point in time).

    2. Simplifying life when its a want rather than a need - 14 watches down to a handful, dont miss the majority of them apart from the 1 i bought back, having a classic car was fun when the weather was good but the bills and headache for when it was on the drive not being used was a drain and outweighed the joys of sunny Sunday driving.

    3. Alone time - its needed away from everyone just to gather your thoughts if nothing else.

    All in all makes me a happy human, and tolerable so they tell me :-)

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