What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but their flag is a big plus.
Why was the sand wet?
Because the sea weed.
Best Regards - Peter
I'd hate to be with you when you're on your own.
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but their flag is a big plus.
Best Regards - Peter
I'd hate to be with you when you're on your own.
What’s the difference between a Scotsman and Walt Disney?
A Scotsman wears a kilt and Walt Disney.
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Did you hear about the guy on a brewery visit who fell into a large container of beer and drowned. They said it would have been quicker, but he got out three times to go to the toilet.
What's invisible and smells of worms?
Blackbird farts.
Best Regards - Peter
I'd hate to be with you when you're on your own.
It's Open Mike night at autopsy club.
What do the letters D.N.A. stand for?
National Dyslexics Association.
Best Regards - Peter
I'd hate to be with you when you're on your own.
A group of us walked into a posh restaurant. The Maitre' D asked "do you have reservations?" I said "Yes, but we want to eat here anyway."
Best Regards - Peter
I'd hate to be with you when you're on your own.
Some good ones here:
http://www.valebowlingclub.co.uk/Chic_Murray.htm
I like this one:
Scene ; Chic and Maidie at Edinburgh airport , next in line to check in , festooned with luggage – en route to, let’s say, Lanzarote.
Maidie; You’re very quiet, Chic –everything all right?
Chic; Och, I’m just wishing we had our piano here…
Maidie; The piano?? Why on earth would we want the piano at an airport?
Chic; because our flight tickets – and the passports – are on it.
Did you hear about the Dyslexic pimp? He bought himself a warehouse.
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What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
What's the difference between illegle and unlawful?
Ones against the law the other is a sick bird.
Following on from an earlier one...
What do you call a blind dinosaurs dog?
Didyouthinkhesaurus rex.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?
He sold his soul to Santa.