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Thread: Let's get serious - the fried breakfast

  1. #1
    Master Lampoc's Avatar
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    Let's get serious - the fried breakfast

    There seems to be a lot of trivial posts on the forum right now about missing post, 26 million dollars etc so let's ramp it up with a serious and controversial subject - the fried breakfast. This article on the BBC website got me thinking - what is the perfect fried breakfast? http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-43372765

    THE most important thing is sausages. If you eat value Asda sausages for breakfast then stay the hell off my thread - your opinion isn't wanted here. Newmarket sausages are by far and away the best. I prefer them cooked in the oven but fried is acceptable too. Proper Lincolnshire sausages from a butcher are also good.

    Bacon. Smoked back from a butchers that hasn't been injected with half a pint of water per pack like the crap that Tesco sell which oozes a weird jism like substance during frying.

    Some people say baked beans should never be part of a fry-up. Those people are deluded. Branston 1st, Heinz 2nd.

    Mushrooms. Fresh and fried - none of that tinned junk.

    Tomatoes. Fresh and fried - none of that tinned junk (again).

    Eggs. I prefer scrambled, cooked in a pan with butter and pepper. NOT microwaved - this isn't a Little Chef.

    Black pudding. Fried. It's all pigs blood and oatmeal - who cares where you buy it from.

    Bread and butter, not toast. You can't mop up properly with toast. A freshly sliced sandwich loaf is best but I also quite like Warburtons - it seems to stay fresher for much longer. Good job Warburtons chemical additive division!

    Finally, a mug of tea made with a decent tea-bag. None of this pretentious leaf in a teapot sh*t - it's not 1950. Milk, 1 sugar.

    I look forward to everyone agreeing with my choice, otherwise you're wrong.
    Last edited by Lampoc; 17th March 2018 at 10:52.

  2. #2
    Grand Master number2's Avatar
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    Sausages, need to be about 95%+meat though a butchers own 'lorne' sausage is even better, mushrooms fresh ceps, eggs local and free range, toast with 'cranks' bread buttered with a thin coating of marmite.
    Tea 'Yorkshire'.
    "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."

  3. #3
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    Hand made Sausages from my local butchers farm shop
    Gloucester Old spot best back bacon from above
    Beans Branston
    Black pudding from above
    Fresh tomatoes grilled
    Fried Egg
    Mushrooms fried in salt pepper and a little butter

  4. #4
    Agree with most of the above
    However, the forum Goat needs his mushrooms chopped into chunks and simmered in a couple of tablespoons of white wine with a knob of butter with some black pepper
    Slurp

  5. #5
    Master Gruntfuttock's Avatar
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    Agreed almost 100% apart from the bread. I need buttered toast to go with it as I prefer the texture.

  6. #6
    Grand Master WORKSIMON's Avatar
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    Agreed with above but would include dark fried onions and square slice sausage along with a well fired fresh white roll yum yum 😋
    Cheers

    Simon



    Ralph Waldo Emerson: We ask for long life, but 'tis deep life, or noble moments that signify. Let the measure of time be spiritual, not mechanical.

  7. #7
    Needs more Scottish input - cannot beat a fried potato scone - superb for mopping up lightly fried eggs. Some people like a slice of haggis but probably a bit too intense flavour wise that early. Fruit pudding lovely also - have only ever seen this in the ubiquitous Scottish breakfast packs on sale practically everywhere up here. Kinda like a doughy suety slice of heaven with raisins and sultanas.

  8. #8
    Master
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    Broadly in agreement but as this is fried breakfast and not a Full English thread then how about the addition of some white pudding, one of Ireland finest exports?

    I can take or leave the beans though!

  9. #9
    Master blackal's Avatar
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    Tomatoes have to be halved and grilled. Tinned tomatoes are for spag-bol.

    Black pudding should be Scottish or Irish - That English stuff with big lumps of white fat is low-grade dog-food.

    Mushrooms must be fresh and grilled.

    Baked Beans mustn't touch the fried egg on the plate.

  10. #10
    Beans in ramekin please to avoid sauce contamination. We’re not savages FFS.

    Also a superb method to avoid flaccid soggy toast when you’re doing beans on toast

  11. #11
    Master Wolfie's Avatar
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    Branstons (used to be Cross and Blackwell) beans are better than Heinz - fact (that means you canít dispute it)

    I prefer a chipolata - straight up English no poncing about type
    Good quality smoked back bacon
    Scramblers with butter and olive oil cooked in a large open pan super quick, so that theyíre still eggy
    Fresh mushroom
    Doorstep toast dripping in butter
    Tea
    And Brown sauce

    Like black pudding, but, canít be bothered to cook it

    You can stick your tomatoes where the sun donít shine

  12. #12
    Pork sausages, Bassett bangers perfect
    Fried egg goes without saying.
    Thick smoked back bacon or streaky is fine
    Black pudding a must
    Tinned tomatoes not fresh.
    Fresh mushrooms
    The Baked Bean is a no no for me with a fried breakfast and should be banished from the plate.
    Toast and real butter
    The absolute must a nice pot of tea.

    Simple things.

  13. #13
    Apprentice
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    Quote Originally Posted by StuS View Post
    Broadly in agreement but as this is fried breakfast and not a Full English thread then how about the addition of some white pudding, one of Ireland finest exports?

    I can take or leave the beans though!
    +1 for the white pudding

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  14. #14
    Grand Master andrewcregan's Avatar
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    Black Pudding is a must have, but Iíll take Haggis with my breakfast too.
    Plus a Tattie Scone.

    Never been a fan of square sausage though, so standard pork will do, and at least two rashers of bacon.
    Any brand baked beans.
    Bread preference is brown, but breakfast equals white buttered toast.
    Oh, and a fried egg, although I donít eat the white!

  15. #15
    Master Lampoc's Avatar
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    I notice we have quite a few fry-up philistines on the forum but it warms my heart to see that not one person has yet mentioned the dreaded hash brown. Kudos!

  16. #16
    Master
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    Good pork sausages
    Good bacon
    Heinz beans but the Aldi prime ones are surprisingly good
    Fried eggs
    Fried white bread
    Fried mushrooms
    Chilled fresh orange juice
    Proper strong black loose leaf tea

  17. #17
    Grand Master magirus's Avatar
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    Whatever other items you have in you breakfast, you must have baked beans, they must be Branston (not Heinz slop) and they must be heated in the frying pan you cooked your bacon in.

  18. #18
    Grand Master Andyg's Avatar
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    Two rashers of dry smoked bacon from the local butcher, cooked until the rind goes crispy
    mushrooms sauted with pepper - no oil, grease, etc.
    Egg - fried in the bacon fat
    two slices of white bread (sandwich loaf) from the local baker with Anchor spreadable.
    1 Sausage - Heck pork (Waitrose)
    4 vine tomatos - fried
    left over mashed potato - fried with pepper and salt - no oil, fat, etc.
    Beans - Branston
    tea - Yorkshire, milk and a sweetener.
    No ketchup or brown sauce - as it's sh*t.

    All cooked by me every Saturday.

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  19. #19
    Master AlphaOmega's Avatar
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    Can't really disagree with you, Lamps.

    The only thing that would make it better is for it to be made by someone else.

  20. #20

    Let's get serious - the fried breakfast

    All above looks yummy.

    Add: Hot toast with dripping or a piece of pap white bread to wipe the frying pan to soak up the bacon fat.

    Bowl of Shreddies for starters.


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  21. #21
    Journeyman
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    My only addition to all of this is that tomatoes should never appear on a fried breakfast. They aren't even food!


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  22. #22
    Craftsman
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    When north of the border mine would definitely include square sausage and haggis. Totally agree with the comments re quality ingredients. For me though mushroom will never set foot near the plate, tomato if grilled or fried needs to be soft, chips have no place at breakfast and eggs whether fried or poached have to be runny.

  23. #23
    Master
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    I am glad nobody as recommended Richmond sausages, they have to be the worst prices of shite ever.

  24. #24
    Master luckywatch's Avatar
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    Good lord Lampoc, I thought you would know better. I have had an Ulster fry, a full Scottish and I once sat down in a hotel in north wales and asked for a full English, I was only young at the time, that's my excuse. Being a Londoner it is certain that the best breakfast comes from there and 100% the best black pudding is from the old country and is called Clonakilty.
    I shall be monitoring you.........................................


    http://www.clonakiltyblackpudding.ie/

  25. #25
    Itís a fry-up so the bread must be fried bread - none of this bread and butter malarkey!

  26. #26
    Craftsman
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    Sausage - Richmondís will do, nothing fancy.
    Bacon - Back, well done or fat trimmed.
    Black pudding - compulsory.
    Beans - yep, any decent brand.
    Eggs - Fried
    Hash brown - Iíll take a couple of they are going but can live without.
    Fried bread or Toast - White
    Buttered bread - probably white again but can live with whole meal or even granary.
    Brown sauce - HP
    Pepper - plenty
    Orange juice - fresh
    Coffee - Strong

    Keep your tomatoes and fungi.

  27. #27
    Master
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    The only changes for me would be fried eggs, 2 at least and plenty of toast, not bread, preferably enough toast to have homemade marmalade on a round or 2 at the end kind of like a pudding course, 2nd mug of proper tea preferably.

    IMO Yanks can't do breakfast due to their tendency to try and sweeten things, additional pancakes, maple syrup and so on.

    Although toasted onion bagel, cream cheese and lox is pretty good but it aint a fry up.

  28. #28
    Master blackal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by luckywatch View Post
    Good lord Lampoc, I thought you would know better. I have had an Ulster fry, a full Scottish and I once sat down in a hotel in north wales and asked for a full English, I was only young at the time, that's my excuse. Being a Londoner it is certain that the best breakfast comes from there and 100% the best black pudding is from the old country and is called Clonakilty.
    I shall be monitoring you.........................................


    http://www.clonakiltyblackpudding.ie/

    Clonakilty is okay, but not superlative..........

    McLeod's Stornoway blackpudding
    Speyside Speciality blackpudding
    Ramsays of Carluke blackpudding
    Malcolm Allan blackpudding.

    All eclipse Clonakilty for quality.

  29. #29
    Master Lampoc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anz3001 View Post
    Sausage - Richmondís will do, nothing fancy.
    Richmond's sausages? Richmond's goddamn sausages? Ye gods man, have some dignity.

  30. #30
    I agree with Lampy but has to have fried bread and fried eggs.

    Not scrambled and never those poncey poached buggers!

    Those are only for the Christmas Eggs Benedict!

    Plus I donít mind the tinned plum tomatoes when hungover!

    PS. Anyone who recommends Richmond sausages needs to be banned - utter tripe!

  31. #31
    Quote Originally Posted by Lampoc View Post
    Richmond's sausages? Richmond's goddamn sausages? Ye gods man, have some dignity.
    Again a yes, I agree!

  32. #32
    Powters Newmarket sausages, fried egg, black pudding, Heinz beans, decent smoked bacon, fried Soda bread and fried potato bread. Need to have plenty of HP sauce as well.

  33. #33
    Craftsman
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    Bacon - crispy
    Sausages - high quality and grilled
    Black pud - fried
    Eggs - fried and NOT NEXT TO BEANS AS PREVIOUSLY SPECIFIED
    Baked beans - critical to a decent fry-up. Sorry Franky
    Mushrooms - fresh and then fried
    Bread - either fried or just as bread. No toast
    Tea - Yorkshire with one sugar

    Perfection

  34. #34
    Master draftsmann's Avatar
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    The best cooked breakfasts Iíve had have been in Scotland. Venison sausages and fried oatmeal, omnomnom.

    These days I fry very little, so my sausages (from a good butcher) and bacon (dry cured and smoked) are cooked in the oven, and the eggs poached. Vine tomatoes grilled.

    Black pudding is best sliced and eaten as-is, it doesnít need frying or grilling. Iíve had to set waitresses straight when theyíve said ďyou canít eat it raw!Ē Itís a cooked meat product- if it was raw it would be a bucket of blood!

    Sourdough bread with a good salted whey butter.

    Baked beans- preferably Heinz but thanks to the salt and sugar nazis I add a good pinch of salt and a teaspoon of sugar. And they have to be heated slowly in a pan, not microwaved unless you want bullets in watery gloop. Most importantly of all they have to be in a separate bowl SO THEY DONT TOUCH THE EGG.

    And this talk of teabags is just wrong. I use loose leaf tea most of the time but as a cooked breakfast is an occasional indulgence why compromise on the tea? We need something stronger than a regular breakfast tea, so Iíd go with a good Assam.

  35. #35
    Master MFB Scotland's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MattMM View Post
    Needs more Scottish input - cannot beat a fried potato scone - superb for mopping up lightly fried eggs. Some people like a slice of haggis but probably a bit too intense flavour wise that early. Fruit pudding lovely also - have only ever seen this in the ubiquitous Scottish breakfast packs on sale practically everywhere up here. Kinda like a doughy suety slice of heaven with raisins and sultanas.
    You have nailed it except the haggis which IMO works really well.

    black and fruit pudding is an amazing combo

  36. #36
    Craftsman
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lampoc View Post
    Richmond's sausages? Richmond's goddamn sausages? Ye gods man, have some dignity.
    I prefer a skinny cheap sausage with a fry up. Lord knows why, Iíd not touch them otherwise, but in amongst the melting pot of grease they work for me.

  37. #37
    Grand Master Foxy100's Avatar
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    Heinz beans only? That's delusional. They changed the recipe and removed all the sugary salty goodness and it now tastes rubbish. Cross & Blackwell for me.
    You can live in your car but you can't drive your house.

  38. #38
    Master draftsmann's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Foxy100 View Post
    Heinz beans only? That's delusional. They changed the recipe and removed all the sugary salty goodness and it now tastes rubbish. Cross & Blackwell for me.
    As per my post above, it is but the work of a moment to put the missing sugar and salt back in.

  39. #39
    Actually one of the things the Yanks do well is proper hash browns. Big patty of shredded potato and onion, lightly crisped on outside, well seasoned. Brilliant with a dash of Tabasco or 6. Not like Satanís frozen triangles you get here.

  40. #40
    I don't have any real beef with the humble baked bean. In the right place (toast) they are fantastic however, on a fried breakfast I find them just a little too sweet.
    If I do have them they have to be cooked until they go all fluffy, basically over cook them.

  41. #41
    Master mickylall's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lampoc View Post
    Newmarket sausages are by far and away the best.
    Are you on glue? I refuse to read another word

  42. #42
    Grand Master
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    sausages (3) and bacon (4) from here: http://www.fieldsofanlaby.co.uk/prod...chers/sausages
    eggs fried (at least 2)
    tomatoes - here i prefer tinned plum
    beans - branston
    fried onion
    fried fresh mushrooms
    1 fried bread
    1 buttered toast
    2 slices nice white bread buttered
    small slice black pud (a newly acquired taste, i hated it for years, but a small piece is now appreciated)
    huge mug of strong yorkshire tea, or a good coffee.
    Last edited by ktmog6uk; 13th March 2018 at 22:43.
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  43. #43
    Quote Originally Posted by ktmog6uk View Post
    sausages (3) and bacon (4) from here: http://www.fieldsofanlaby.co.uk/prod...chers/sausages
    eggs fried (at least 2)
    tomatoes - here i prefer tinned plum
    beans - branston
    fried onion
    fried fresh mushrooms
    1 fried bread
    1 buttered toast
    2 slices nice white bread buttered
    small slice black pub (a newly acquired taste, i hated it for years, but a small piece is now appreciated)
    huge mug of strong yorkshire tea, or a good coffee.
    Tinned toms rule in north ,ya canít get them down London Town,old the onions though


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  44. #44
    Good Sausages are the key, but I don't get to the butchers often. After many man hours of research
    , my favourite supermarket Sausages are 'black farmer'.
    Not a fan of toms or beans, so leave them out.
    Like a little black pudding, bought one the other day from supermarket, bury best or something, shocked to find out it was made with haemoglobin powder rather than real blood, tasted dry and awfull

  45. #45
    Journeyman
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    does no one have chips as part of their fry-up? if its an option on the menu then its got to be on the plate for me!

  46. #46
    Master
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    Quote Originally Posted by ray_li30 View Post
    does no one have chips as part of their fry-up? if its an option on the menu then its got to be on the plate for me!
    nah gotta be fried boiled spuds from the day before IF you're going there. Yesterdays sprouts, fried also an option but can get a bit windy later if you've beans on the plate.

  47. #47
    Quote Originally Posted by ray_li30 View Post
    does no one have chips as part of their fry-up? if its an option on the menu then its got to be on the plate for me!
    We're talking breakfast here man not brunch FFS!!

  48. #48
    Master
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    Quote Originally Posted by Foxy100 View Post
    Heinz beans only? That's delusional. They changed the recipe and removed all the sugary salty goodness and it now tastes rubbish. Cross & Blackwell for me.

    Cross & Blackwell are branded Branston now

  49. #49
    Master
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    I'm assuming the Ulster boys will be along shortly to put you all right, but anything with baked beans and no soda farl, just scrape it into the bin.

  50. #50
    Master MFB Scotland's Avatar
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    Fried bread is also a great option

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