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Thread: TOTALLY RUBBISH films you've watched recently...

  1. #601
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    Quote Originally Posted by snowman View Post
    I quite enjoyed 3, 4 and 5 (although I'll concede they're pretty formulaic), but 2 was an insult to the intellect of an ant!

    M.
    Yes but 2 had Thandie Newton in it....mmmmm

  2. #602
    Grand Master snowman's Avatar
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    Not enough to redeem it though :)

    M
    Breitling Cosmonaute 809 - What's not to like?

  3. #603
    Master pacifichrono's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GraniteQuarry View Post
    Another REALLY disappointed with Mad Max: Fury Road

    And I say that as a big fan of MM and Tom Hardy. Impressive action for sure (most of it being non-CGI) but they certainly left the plot in Bartertown. Not one of Hardy's finest, I hope they do way better in the coming slots he's signed for.
    You OBVIOUSLY did not see the film in a movie theater.

    Let me guess...on your smartphone during a bumpy plane trip. Bingo!

  4. #604
    Grand Master SimonK's Avatar
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    Mad Max was gayer than Top Gun; Tom Hardy is stuck in the desert with Rosie Huntingdon Whiteley, Rosie Keogh and Abbey Lee and what does he do? He shoots one in the leg and pokes off is what he does. Gay.

  5. #605
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    The Ouija Exepriment. Netflix led me to this tripe! Not even remotely scarey!

  6. #606
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    I couldn't finish the Hateful Eight as I thought it was pants.

  7. #607
    The Lunchbox. It got great reviews but my god was it slow and uneventful!

  8. #608
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    this was on freeview the other day so appalling it was almost good.




  9. #609
    Grand Master Neil.C's Avatar
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    Iron Man 3.

    Basically just a long drawn out series of explosions.
    Cheers,
    Neil.

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  10. #610
    Master Tokyo Tokei's Avatar
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    Minions. Dire.

  11. #611

    The Lobster

    A total stack of sh1t
    Don't take this one out of the tank!

  12. #612
    Master zelig's Avatar
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    Hamburger Hill

    I like war movies, watch lots of them - but some how this one had slipped the net.
    I decided to remedy that & watched it last night.

    I was pretty disappointed.
    Maybe I'd set my expectations too high, but it was just a bit ... Meh.

    z

  13. #613
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    Lesbian Vampire Killers. James Corden, Matthew Horne and sundry half-dressed totty. Utter $hite.

    Rob

  14. #614
    Master TimeOut's Avatar
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    Thumbs up

    45 Years.

    Absolute Turkey.

  15. #615
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    Slow to learn

    A young lady once made me watch Dirty Dancing. Shudder.

    Then, some years later, another young lady made me sit through The Bodyguard. Yikes!

    There's a few hours of my life that I'll never get back.

    I suspect that at least part of my happy marriage can be attributed to the fact that the present Mrs Cornholio has never made me sit through one of those dismal romantic comedies that she enjoys. We do sometimes visit the cinema together, but go in to different screens.

  16. #616
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    Sicario...

    Had really high hopes for this movie, but it was a total fiasco :(

  17. #617
    Master pacifichrono's Avatar
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    "Frankenhooker".................need I say more?




  18. #618
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    I think you may have missed the point, Frankenhooker was awesome!!

  19. #619
    Grand Master SimonK's Avatar
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    I'd never heard of it so I just checked on IMDB, apparently Patty Mullen (Elizabeth) will be back this year in Zombinatrix!

  20. #620
    Quote Originally Posted by johnthemull View Post
    A total stack of sh1t
    Don't take this one out of the tank!
    I agree total sh1te

  21. #621
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    Have had Avengers Assemble on in the background for the last couple of hours as it's on Netflix and I thought it might be entertaining background noise, but boy is it terrible - just one long series of noisy CGI'd fight scenes, explosions and hammy acting / accents. Really, really terrible. The guy with the toy hammer (?Thor) just looks (and sounds) utterly ridiculous! But given the success of the series, clearly I am alone in my thoughts here! I love Tom Hiddlesdon but my god he looks and sounds more hammy than anything I have seen recently.


  22. #622
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    On recommendation of a good friend.



    Struggle through first 40 minutes then went straight for the >> .. May be it wasn't a good timing or (and?) I'm not ready to reflect yet.. Shame as it's got raving reviews though.

  23. #623
    Grand Master Neil.C's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ach5 View Post
    Have had Avengers Assemble on in the background for the last couple of hours as it's on Netflix and I thought it might be entertaining background noise, but boy is it terrible - just one long series of noisy CGI'd fight scenes, explosions and hammy acting / accents. Really, really terrible. The guy with the toy hammer (?Thor) just looks (and sounds) utterly ridiculous! But given the success of the series, clearly I am alone in my thoughts here! I love Tom Hiddlesdon but my god he looks and sounds more hammy than anything I have seen recently.



    Apart from perhaps the early Spider man films all the Marvel films are the same, one long succession of explosions and embarrassing acting.

    Being a fan of the old comics I always look at the films but am always disappointed.

    Recently saw Iron Man 3 - utter cak.
    Cheers,
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  24. #624
    Grand Master Carlton-Browne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by VDG View Post
    Struggle through first 40 minutes then went straight for the >> .. May be it wasn't a good timing or (and?) I'm not ready to reflect yet.. Shame as it's got raving reviews though.
    That's a shame - The Great Beauty and Marvellous were the two best things I saw in 2014. The soundtrack is excellent too.

  25. #625
    As Above, So below.

    Another first person, cam footage type film...Interesting enough in parts, and I kind of liked it, but it is rubbish!

  26. #626
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    The new Charlie Brown / Snoopy movie at the cinema with my kids.

  27. #627
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    The new Charlie Brown / Snoopy movie at the cinema with my kids..

  28. #628
    Quote Originally Posted by smithdj10 View Post
    The new Charlie Brown / Snoopy movie at the cinema with my kids..
    No good?

  29. #629
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    Excuse my double post above!

    I didn't think so and nor did my 4 year old who asked to go home after 40 mins. Mind you my 7 year old boy seemed to persevere.

  30. #630
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    talking pictures Freeview channel 81 some bad and therefore almost brilliant old B movies

    I particularly like the British films and spotting famous actors before they are famous

    try not to be scared by the most unrealistic, lumbering robot in the history of time
    Target Earth


  31. #631
    Craftsman Dan88's Avatar
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    5th wave. Watched it online and wanted my money back that I didn't pay. Terrible, terrible film.

  32. #632
    The big short

    What a pile of crap

  33. #633
    Grand Master Carlton-Browne's Avatar
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    Hector and the Search for Happiness

    http://www.imdb.org/title/tt1626146/...nm_flmg_act_11
    I realise that Simon Pegg appears to have "made it" on the other side of the pond but if all he intends to produce is this sort of schmaltzy, sanctimonious crap then he can retire now - Hot Fuzz it isn't. IMDB has it at 6.9 (God only knows how) but I note that Rotten Tomatoes has it at a much more accurate 4.6. To give an example of the way it played to stereotypes, the main character pitches up in Africa which is an excuse to switch into Daktari mode followed by a stretch of Heart of Darkness - I was waiting for Idi Amin to make a guest appearance. Utter rubbish.

  34. #634
    Grand Master SimonK's Avatar
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    I read the original book the film was based on - Le Voyage d'Hector - which was semi-biographical, François Lelord is a psychiatrist who was an attending physician and had a practice in Paris, he now lives in Vietnam. The book was given to me by his publisher who told me it was a surprise success, especially in Germany. The book was very good, I guess it's no surprise Simon Pegg's film was never released in France.

  35. #635
    Grand Master Carlton-Browne's Avatar
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    I am Love - the alternative title being Patek Philippe - The Movie. The stock photo below should illustrate how I've arrived at this name:



    A fairly turgid story about a rich Milanese family who own a textile business - most of the principals really could be straight out of the legendary PP ads. In the plot one of the sons dies in a tragic poolside accident and the penultimate scene of entire movie cuts to the belly of his pregnant girlfriend - presumably the actual owner of the Calatrava until the cycle inevitably moves on. The photo above does give the game away inasmuch it's only really about the look and feel of the movie rather than any actual content, plot, dialogue or character development. On the subject of dialogue there is a short segment in English and if the original Italian is that badly written then all I can say is thank God for subtitles. Tilda Swinton gets her kit off quite a bit, if that's your thing, and some of that is actually shot rather well.

    Avoid.

  36. #636
    Grand Master Carlton-Browne's Avatar
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    Not technically a film but belongs here in any case; recently we watched a 3-part adaptation of the Evelyn Waugh's Sword of Honour Trilogy with Daniel Craig taking the role of Guy Crouchback. Although it's some time since I've read the book(s) I can't say that Craig's leaden performance bears any resemblance at all to Crouchback in the original (I know this was ever thus with film adaptations but one can live in hope). On the plus side there are rather good performances from a string of minor English character actors - difficult to list them all but I'm sure the IMDB listing has them. Tom Hiddleston for the next Bond.

    http://www.imdb.org/title/tt0273021/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

  37. #637
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    The Counsellor
    Looks good on paper but it was dismal.... Most disappointing

  38. #638
    Journeyman Ukal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ukmidnite View Post
    The Counsellor
    Looks good on paper but it was dismal.... Most disappointing
    Apart from the Brad Pitt scene towards the end. Laughed my head off at that bit ...

  39. #639
    A totally hyped, 10 Cloverfield Lane. That ending puhleaseeeee.

  40. #640
    Master zelig's Avatar
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    For reasons attributable only to a few Heineken, I sat through Black Sheep a few nights ago...

    Don't bother. Please...

    z

  41. #641
    Grand Master SimonK's Avatar
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    Just saw The Nice Guys with Russell Crowe (fatter than Val Kilmer) and Ryan Gosling. Unbelievably bad considering the actors, the director, the producer and the premise - how could they have made such a crap film? Crowe and Gosling are doing a poor imitation of Laurel and Hardy and all the seventies stuff which could have been fun - music, clothes, etc. was completely wasted.

  42. #642
    Recently got round to watching Hail Caesar (Coen Brothers and George Clooney) and Star Wars VII, both rubbish, had expected so much more. I don't think that I have ever seen such bad acting as the main characters in Star Wars.


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  43. #643
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    Sunshine. Appalling. I lost interest.

    San Andreas. Wow. Terrible.

  44. #644
    Bad Neighbours 2 awful ! The first one was much better.

  45. #645
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    Zoolander 2, cannot believe it took 15 years to produce such a god aweful piece of crap. Honestly one of the worst films I have seen for a long long time.

    Considering how great the first one was it's a real insult!!

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  46. #646
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    The new Point Break (not so much a remake as a reimagining?) is absolutely dire.

  47. #647
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    Iron Man 3, what a waste of £10 and a total waste of time, should of just stuck with Iron man 1 that was passable.

  48. #648
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sweepinghand View Post
    The big short

    What a pile of crap
    I thought it was good!

  49. #649
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    Me too, great movie!

    Sent from my HTC One_M8 using Tapatalk

  50. #650
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    Mother!

    It's like an ambitious and talentless 'A' level film student was given a multi million pound budget

    Baffling

    4 great actors too…. What were they thinking??!

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