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Thread: Jokes of the day

  1. #1
    Administrator swanbourne's Avatar
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    Oct 2002
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    Sheffield, England
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    Jokes of the day

    Elton John goes into the doctor's office and has some tests run.
    The doctor comes back and says "Elton, I'm not going to beat around the
    bush. You have AIDS."

    Elton is devastated. "Doc, what can I do?"

    "Eat one sausage, one head of cabbage, 20 unpeeled carrots drenched in
    hot sauce, ten Jalapeno peppers, 40 walnuts and 40 peanuts, 1/2 box of Grape Nut cereal, and top it off with a gallon of prune juice."

    Elton asks, "Will that cure me, Doc?"

    Doc says, "No, but it should leave you with a better understanding of
    what your arse is for."
    ========================================
    A teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class.
    She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to gather
    the building materials for his home.

    She read, "And so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full
    of straw and said: 'Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to
    build my house?"

    The teacher paused, then asked the class, "And what do you think the man said?"

    One little boy raised his hand and said very matter-of-factly, "I think
    the man would have said: 'Well, f*** me, a talking pig.'"
    Whole chunks of my life come under the heading "it seemed like a good idea at the time".

  2. #2
    Master
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    Mar 2003
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    Texas
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    ROTFLMFAO!

    :lol: :lol: :lol:

    Those are pretty good. Think I'll share those with my mates at work. :lol:

  3. #3
    Master Jeroen's Avatar
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    Schalkwijk, The Netherlands
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    Thanks Eddie...

    :lol: :lol: :lol:

  4. #4
    Grand Master
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    Very good indeed :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

    Ming

  5. #5
    Master markc's Avatar
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    Jul 2003
    Location
    Edinburgh - directing IT stuff
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    3,832

    LOL

    Passed them on - hope they're not copyright! :lol: :lol: :lol:

    Cheers,

  6. #6
    Master
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    Sep 2003
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    The shire of berks
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    :lol: :lol: :lol:

    They'll shortly be going around my office too

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