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swanbourne
10th November 2003, 21:29
Elton John goes into the doctor's office and has some tests run.
The doctor comes back and says "Elton, I'm not going to beat around the
bush. You have AIDS."

Elton is devastated. "Doc, what can I do?"

"Eat one sausage, one head of cabbage, 20 unpeeled carrots drenched in
hot sauce, ten Jalapeno peppers, 40 walnuts and 40 peanuts, 1/2 box of Grape Nut cereal, and top it off with a gallon of prune juice."

Elton asks, "Will that cure me, Doc?"

Doc says, "No, but it should leave you with a better understanding of
what your arse is for."
========================================
A teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class.
She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to gather
the building materials for his home.

She read, "And so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full
of straw and said: 'Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to
build my house?"

The teacher paused, then asked the class, "And what do you think the man said?"

One little boy raised his hand and said very matter-of-factly, "I think
the man would have said: 'Well, f*** me, a talking pig.'"

mindbender
10th November 2003, 21:41
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Those are pretty good. Think I'll share those with my mates at work. :lol:

Jeroen
10th November 2003, 22:05
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Ming Thein
11th November 2003, 07:53
Very good indeed :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ming

markc
11th November 2003, 09:58
Passed them on - hope they're not copyright! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Cheers,

tempus
11th November 2003, 14:06
:lol: :lol: :lol:

They'll shortly be going around my office too