I hadn’t heard from one of my old best mates from Uni for a couple of years.
We shared a room at Uni and we were best mates at the time. We where at Bath together in the late 80s doing Chemical Engineering. He was a good Croydon lad who loved his cricket and we shared some great times. He was popular and fun.
He was much smarter, cleverer and more hardworking me. But, in the final year with 35 hours a week lectures, and a research and design project, the pressure got to him and he had a mini breakdown. I thought nothing of it at the time. I guess that was the first weak signal.
We had grown apart since Uni, but had been in fairly regular contact. We shared some texts on the 6th Nov 2020, just having a laugh and chewing the fat over Covid.
He was a massive Crystal Palace fan, and I sent him a text on the 20th Dec 2020 after they CP had been trounced, just to rub it in. I never go a reply and assumed he was no longer interested in keeping in touch. He had taken his own life in between the correspondence.
I looked him up tonight, because I did not get a reply to my message. I found his obituary on the internet. I did not know, so could not even pay my respects. He left his wife and daughter. It is unimaginable the pain he must have been going through to take his own life and leave his wife and daughter behind.
RIP Stuey.
Oh man, heartbreaking tale, so sorry for your loss, especially in the circumstances...
I suddenly and unexpectedly lost one of my oldest and closest friends very recently, and - though I know how little weight it carries - I do know how it feels. Nearly three weeks on and I'm still trying to process it, but at least he had his proverbial "four-score-and-ten"...
Talk, share, eulogise. It's all we have at these times.
Sorry to hear that. My condolences to his family.
Oooof that's tragic. So sorry to hear that :-(
So sorry to hear .
Very sad news, a dreadfull thing to go through for all concerned. So sorry.
Sorry for your loss.
You just never know what people are going through in their own minds.
Terrible! So sorry.
Sorry to read this.
This is a massive problem in the rural area where i live, my brother has lost at least two mates this way.
That's terrible. So sorry for your loss. I've lost two male friends to suicide during my lifetime. Both sudden and unexpected. It hits hard and leaves you second guessing what you could have done better. Mental health is so important. Sadly not considered a health priority in our society, but hopefully things are improving. It's the stigma that stops people talking about what they're going through and it's the not talking that kills.
Similar happened to me in 2009. My mate who was suffering depression and I were due to watch a champions league match on TV but got the date wrong. We rearranged for the following week but he took his own life later that evening. Still hurts.
My condolences to all.
Really sorry to hear that…. Good mates are really important
I’m truly sorry to read this and having been in similar situations with colleagues and friends who couldn’t go on, found comfort in knowing they’d probably been planning the deed for a while and so there was probably not a lot I could’ve done in the immediate before.
I’ve now got myself researched and trained to help folk where I can in such desperate situations and to look for signs. It’s tough.
If you want to talk, kick the cat, shout, scream or cry noTAglove just reach out. Here for you.
What strength I can muster is sent here to you and all family and friends.
Jim
So sorry to hear this mate.
Impossible to predict when it happens, look at Garry Speed.
It must be terrible for the people they leave behind.
Cheers,
Neil.
I’m sorry to hear this new and for the loss.
The matter is definitely moving more into the open, and the faster it does so, the easier these things will become to spot and hopefully help.
Sorry for your loss.
Suicide is far too common in youngish men and always tragic for those left behind.
A good friend of ours with a lovely young family killed himself a few days before Xmas a couple of years ago.
Andy
Wanted - Damasko DC57
My condolences, it's a dreadful thing.
Horrible to lose a mate, even worse when it's suicide as you're always left thinking could I have done more, or spotted the signs. In reality there's usually little anyone could have done, RIP Stuey.
A friend of a work colleague killed themselves last week, it was devastating for my colleague.
Sorry to hear your friend took his life, and even worse you only realised two years later.
Adieu, Stuey.
Someone who lies about the little things will lie about the big things too.
This is very sad and way too common.
Friends, if you’re feeling bad talk to someone.
Sorry to hear this. I had a similar experience when looking up a bloke I knew at college, basically together in almost all the same lectures in Economics for 3 years plus sharing a house, laughs, beers, etc.
I found a tribute to him on the net. Staggered.
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Originally Posted by mjrennie
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