Reply With QuoteIn the old days of rubbish car locks I did get into a car the same make and colour as mine.
it took me 10minutes when the key wouldn’t work the ignition before I realised mine was a bit further down the road.
Last week I parked my VW Up behind the X3 of a former colleague like I did so often when we worked together. And now, when I went to his office for quick coffee, I did the same.
When I returned back to my car an hour later, I noticed someone inside my colleague's car! Someone trying to steal his car, while sitting 'casually' behind the wheel. So I started walking faster towards his car. Carefully hiding my plans: within a split second, I decided to walk up to my car (remember, it was parked behind the SUV!) and change course right after passing the X3. So that I could sneak up from behind, opening the car door and then... well, I hadn't figured that out, really...
All happened within 30 meters, within seconds. I walked up to the X3, approaching from the rear of the car - when I spotted a little child in the backseat! The guts to nick a car with your child with you. I reached out for door handle when my mind stepped on the brake! My colleague has anthracite wheels on his X3, this one had silver wheels! One quick look at the parking lot - and there was, 20 meters down the parking: this X3 with anthracite wheels.
Really with my hand nearly touching the door handle, I took a sharp left turn, back to my car. As if I'd had to turn back as if I'd forgotten to take something out of my car... The guy behind the wheel hadn't noticed anything - he was holding his Galaxy to his ear.
This nearly went bad for me. Surely I am not the only one with this sort of experiences!
Come on, share your own (nearly) embarrassing moments...
Menno
In the old days of rubbish car locks I did get into a car the same make and colour as mine.
it took me 10minutes when the key wouldn’t work the ignition before I realised mine was a bit further down the road.
Easily done. In B&Q's car park a few years ago I was about to start the car up and someone climbed into the passenger seat. We looked at one another for a second or two, then he saw his car two bays down. An apology and all was fine. Marginal surprise I suppose. Of course, a child changes everything.
Many years ago I was at a 'motivational' convention promoting a well known MLM. I'm not really a 'motivational' sort of guy. There was a woman seated near my group who was dancing madly in the aisle to all the music and applauding madly at all the 'motivational' speakers. She was acting as if she was at a religious revival event, or something like that.
After the event my group got a taxi back to our hotel. As we were walking from the taxi to the hotel, I was rather loudly saying "did you see that nutcase woman who was dancing in the aisle?", only to look up and see that she was right in front of me walking into the same hotel as us.
Whoops.
That was rather embarrassing. (Even more embarrassing that attending the 'motivational' event...)
Years ago in the local supermarket I saw someone I knew (or so I thought) bent over picking something off the lower shelf so I kicked them gently on the bum. She squeaked, stood up, turned around and I was face to face with a complete stranger.
I went red as a beetroot and couldn't apologise enough.
Many moons ago now a friend had a DAF Variomatic, not a popular car and his was even more distinctive due to being a lurid colour.
We we worked together in South London and one day I spotted his car being driven by someone else. Knowing my friend was in work when I’d left there a short while ago I turned my car around and followed the car. Seizing the opportunity at a set of traffic lights I jumped out and, armed with a Crooklock, ran up to my friends car, yanked the door open and grabbed the guy’s shoulder.
It it was probably the most frightening thing the MOT tester had ever experienced at work.
R
Ignorance breeds Fear. Fear breeds Hatred. Hatred breeds Ignorance. Break the chain.
Could have been very embarrassing!!
Several years ago I had an 2002 Saab 93 which I parked up on holiday in Cornwall. When coming back to the car in the evening I almost fell to my knees as it was battered to hell on one side.
Parked next to me was a car which had similar damage to its side which I presumed had caused the damage to mine. Whilst frantically pacing around wondering what to do I happened to glance up to see my car parked 3 up.....something I'd totally missed.
im just glad there was no one around in the other car or the car I thought may have caused the damage.
Last edited by Franky Four Fingers; 4th December 2017 at 23:27.
I was waiting for a taxi early one morning. A car pulled up - I got in the back only to be greeted by a confused looking driver. With a realisation that this wasn't the taxi I was looking for - indeed a taxi at all - I bid an apologetic and hasty retreat. The driver continued to look confused as he also got out and entered the newsagents to pick up his daily read!
Went to a posh black tie do with my missus and a friend. Came out to our waiting taxi, opened the rear passenger door for my missus (ever the gent), whilst the friend got in the rear drivers side.
Before I had time to get to the front passenger door to get in, the taxi drove off the car park and down the road!
Turns out we'd nicked a couple's taxi and the driver, expecting two people only, thought I was the doorman (black tie, etc).
So I got to apologise to the remonstrating couple, whilst awaiting (hopefully) the return of the departed taxi. Needless to say my missus was crying with laughter for about an hour after.
My sister has a black VW Polo and was dropping my daughter and I home from my mum's. It was dark, and my daughter and I saw (ok, me) a black Polo parked up with a lone female sitting in it. Walked up and opened the back door to get my daughter in and then opened the passenger door to get in myself - obviously it wasn't my sister sitting in the car.
Made a quick escape with lots of apologies.
I was in a supermarket car park a few weeks ago when I noticed an elderly chap trying to get into his Honda Civic, which was parked in a disabled bay.
The car wasn’t one of the latest models with a remote keyfob but used a normal key (remember them?). He had finished shopping and upon return to his car seemed to be having trouble opening the door.
Being a public-spirited type I enquired as to the problem and he said his key just wouldn’t turn in the lock. I asked him if I could try and just as I took over the key and tried it in the lock I heard somebody shouting from the direction of the store entrance ‘Oi, what do you think you’re doing? That’s my car!’ and another old boy came hobbling towards me followed by the security guard.
It turns out there was a near-identical Civic in the same colour parked about three spaces away...
On reflection I’m not sure this qualifies as inches away from embarrassment - it was closer than that.
I come out of tesco, bag in hand, searching for the car. I walk over to it, go round the back and open it. I am literally Astonished 😧 to see all my work equipment has been stolen!#*!
Reaching for my phone to call the rozzers, I think, this car looks dirty inside.....
My identical car is 2 spaces away..👺
My flatmate in London was in a real panic one Saturday morning and rushed in to tell me his car had been stolen. He called the police and spent the morning with the police reporting the theft. The car was a nice Jaguar XK8 so it was quite a serious theft. Later that day I walked to the shops and spotted his XK8 some way down the road. I went back to tell him and he was mortified when he remembered last time he had driven the car, around a week before, he had been forced to park way down the road. The police were not impressed.
Along similer lines my brother was once asked to look after a friends car while he was on holiday. His friend was 17 and had bought the car against his parents wishes and basically had to park it anywhere except their driveway. He was told he could use it for local driving if he was careful. We were teenagers, me 19 and my brother 17. On the Saturday my brother decided it would be OK if we drove from Bristol to Croyde Bay in the car to go surfing. We hired wetsuits and surf boards at the beach and my brother decided to do the cool surfer trick of putting the keys in the suspension springs so they wouldn’t get damaged by the sea. Of course the car was stolen while we were surfing. We were in hired wetsuits with no clothes to change into so essentially we were left stranded and naked. Luckily the wetsuit rental lady new the lifeguards, mostly Australians living in caravans in the campsite behind the beach. They loaned us some clothes and money for a pay phone. Our parents were delighted to have to come and collect us and my brothers mate was even more thrilled to get back from holiday and discover his car was stolen. Eventually the car was recovered in Exeter with the stereo ripped out. My brother had to work hard washing dishes in a local kitchen to repay the costs to his mate.
sometimes its not your fault.....
I saw a couple of youngsters racing off on my uncles monkey bike
it was his beloved pride and joy
I followed them and when I saw they had parked up and gone to a pub I raced home to phone my uncle (i was on my BMX the phones had circular rotary dials and were attached to the walls in those days)
I was so out of breath - good job home was nearer than the police station.
turned out he's sold the bike that morning.
IN the late 70s I was working in a factory in Wiltshire and one evening in deepest darkest midwinter left to go home. I walked to my Ford Anglia and started it up. The car park was quite large and poorly lit and I drove towards the main gate, where I felt something was not quite right. Stopped the car to discover it wasn't my Anglia, so I took it back , parked it and found mine.....
Back in secondary school, a friend had moved house one weekend. On Monday we all walked home from school, as we had a thousand times before. He turned off at the top of his street and proceeded to walk into the kitchen of his house, only to see some different stuff in the room and realise he no longer lived there. A quick exit was made!
Quite a few years ago I was talking to a manager when another manager was stood very close behind me (or was passing me by) which I didnt realise. As I turned around, I was startled somewhat and my defence mechanism kicked in and I pushed the manager flying to the floor. Luckily she wasnt pregnant at the time. That would have been really embarrassing.
I was sitting outside the paper shop waiting for my wife in the car when I saw her come out and start yanking at the door handle of the black BMW parked in front of me. A quick toot of the horn drew my wife away from the strangers car. Luckily it was empty.
My embarrassing incident was when I was in a department store with the wife. We got separated and spotting her a few yards away I started chatting away only to realise it was another woman when she turned round!
Cheers,
Neil.
In 1992 I borrowed my sisters radiant red XR2 to go to the cinema with a mate and two girls. I’d just passed and had a metro but I really wanted to show off. I was 19!
We were arching lethal weapon 3 and my driving on the way there was like something from an action movie, hoping to loosen some linen for later on (in my dreams!)
We watched the movie and walked out to get in the hot hatch. I unlocked the door and tilted the seat two get the birds in the back. When they got in the back one commented that she hadn’t noticed the pink panther cuddly toy on the parcel shelf on our earlier journey..........
I then realized that We were now sat in someone else’s radiant red XR2 and beat a hasty retreat to the correct car on the next row!
Yesterday I spent 20 minutes frantically looking for the Captur in a ms car park only to suddenly remember I had driven there in the Clio.
24th December 2016 my Facebook entry:
Well, that was embarrassing. Filled up with petrol in a garage at Playing Place, just south of Truro.
Returned to the car, got in and went to put my wallet in the tray in front of the gear stick. I was confused because the tray was no longer there. I was even more surprised when the lady in the passenger seat said "Hello".
At that point I realised that I was in the wrong car. Despite my profuse apologies she was finding it hysterically funny and pointed out that her husband (who was on his way out of the garage by now) had the same colour pullover on as mine.
It must have been at that point that I realised that there was a child in a car seat in the rear.
Wishing her a Merry Christmas I got out just before hubby got to the car. A few miles down the road on the way to Rosudgeon a car passed us with the lady in the passenger seat waving like mad at me. She was still smiling.
Merry Christmas one and all.
scooter
Finding the Captur would have been more embarassing?Originally Posted by Harry Smith
Coming back from Lisbon a few months ago I was talking to the mrs who was next to me as we were walking through duty free and noticed she 'wasn't listening' so I gave her a gentle prod and an 'oi are you listening?'
The French lady I had mistakenly jabbed was not amused and I was highly embarrassed. I let out some mumbled GCSE french and pointed over to Mrs Rico.
That was awkward.
I tried on a jacket in a shop that turned out to be another customers who had hung it on the end of a rail whilst he was trying another jacket on.
Cheers..
Jase
My father at one point drove a 3-door, magnolia-coloured Opel Kadett in the early 80s (in the UK the same model was sold as a Vauxhall Astra). One of our dogs, Sam (who always associated cars with a trip to the beach) could recognise a light-coloured 3 door Opel Kadett from about 50 yards and would automatically jump in if the door happened to be open and sit obstinately on the back seat. Mercifully everybody he did this to saw the funny side even if sometimes through gritted teeth.
In the Sotadic Zone, apparently.
I once parked my car in a car park in Bracknell at lunchtime, only to find it gone when I returned.
I thought, maybe I'd parked somewhere else and simply forgotten exactly where, but after 10 minutes of searching, I hadn't found it.
I was on the brink of calling the Police to report it stolen when I remembered I'd taken the wife's car to work that morning!
M
Way back in the 90s, I was in a nightclub with my friends that we regularly attended.
We were up on the balcony, which was split level, one level had a Gents, the other level had the Ladies toilet.
Without realising which level I was on, I went into the toilets. My first thought was that they had been renovated and as part of that the urinal was removed.
So, I went into a cubicle and was having a pee when I could hear all these girls in the gent’s toilet. I remember being angry about it at the time. It was then that I realised the cubicle doors were pink and I was in the ladies’ toilet.
I had to wait in there for around 15 minutes before all sounds of girls were gone. I didn't want to open the cubicle door and face a load of screaming and be thrown out as a sexual predator.
So finally, when the coast was clear I made my exit. Only to find all my friends waiting outside creased up laughing at me.
My ex invited her friend down from London for a weekend not long after we'd moved into the house. Seeing as the spare room was being decorated we gave her our room and slept on the airbed in the plasterless spare room. Middle of the night I got up for a wee and got back into bed MY bed, after a few minutes a voice is talking to me about Linda turns out I was in bed with Linda whom I'd only met a few hours earlier. In fairness she laughed it off the ex Mrs not so much genuine mistake though sleeping naked did not help my case.
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Absolument.
I was at a client meeting at their offices. I'd had a heavy night the evening before and was suffering from chronic gas build up. Halfway through the hour meeting I was in severe discomfort due to the gas build up. Once the meeting was over and we did the goodbyes I kind of rushed outside to an outside vegetation area, and quickly checking that nobody was around leant up against a tree and let rip a good 5 seconds worth of proper man fart. An absolute belter. As soon as I finished, from the other side of said tree emerged one of the clients who gave me a look of distaste......
Many times, I've sat at a solitary chair in Redditch Library, only to see a few people looking furtively around, not seeing me, then letting rip.
That made me chuckle!
This sort of reminds me of this from long, long ago...
My mate and I (both of us about 19) were waiting in the queue for the cinema and all of a sudden the young lady in the queue in front of us turned round and started chatting to us. She was pretty, very animated, charming, making lots of eye contact with both of us. I was thinking "this is unusually good luck" and I knew my mate was thinking the same. I was already (perhaps a tad optimistically) mentally planning what to do and where to do it after the movie, and which of us (or both of us!?) was going to be doing it.
And then her boyfriend returned from the box office and joined her in the queue.
She dropped us like hot (and apparently not very tasty) potatoes and my mate and I slunk back in sudden silence, horror, embarrassment and confusion. Her boyfriend shot us an odd look -- he'd seen us talking to her as he approached and probably wondered why the sudden silence and lack of friendly introductions.
Neither my mate nor I were ever sure what exactly had happened there... No, we weren't just over-optimistic young men.
I had something similar years ago when I went with the wife and daughter, who was around 2 years old at the time shopping at Safeways. Does anybody remember Safeways? Did the shopping and headed back towards my car, a silver Honda Accord is. Opened the car and let my daughter into the back. As I went to the drivers door an elderly gentleman came up and started asking me about the car and how the mileage was, he had a similar car and he was getting crap figures.
As we were talking another young couple came right up to my car, the man stood near the boot and the lady went and stood next to my wife who was ready to get into the car.
Stood talking to the elderly gentleman for quite a while and eventually the young lady quite rudely bleated to her partner to go and with that the young guy started to gesture me away.
I asked him what/why he was doing and he said he wanted to get in his car and leave so I pointed to my daughter who was standing on the back seat peering out and asked him if his car had one of those.
The look of embarrassment by both was a sight to see as they had been quite rude.
He also had a silver Accord which was parked a few cars away and both cars came from the same Slough dealership which is what he said threw him.
In a nightclub some years ago (first visit to this one) I had acquired a pretty decent buzz from the lovely beer, and decided to pay a visit to the gents.
Upon going down a poorly lit corridor I reached the door, only to nearly walk into a gent exiting. I excuses myself, stepped back and waited for him to leave, just as he did the same.
I stepped forward, only for the exiting gent to do the same again! After moving back yet again to allow him egress, another patron pushed past me from behind and shoved open the mirrored door...
That’s some buzz from the beer ;)
It's just a matter of time...
I was shooting a large scale film in a studio in India.
The food wasn’t the best : one of the assistant cameramen went down with typhoid and I’d been eating the same food as him.
Luckily I’d had a typhoid shot so I was in serious trouble for a couple of days and then fine.
On the worst day I called up one of my assistants and asked him to come to set to “relieve” me. I was very busy on almost every shot and it was difficult for me to find a minute to run off and take care of the fearsome machinations brewing in my belly.
My assistant arrived and I ran off to a changing room that had been given over to the director and heads of department for toilet use and possesion storage. It was also a lot nicer than the other available rooms.
I won’t go into too much detail but the sounds and stench were something I wouldn’t have believed a human being would create. It was more like some industrial chemical plant exploding than a biological process.
During this unholy mess I heard someone coming in to the room. Film crews are a pretty rough and ready bunch and I assumed no one would be too bothered with the bizarre noises coming out of the bathroom.
I cleaned the place up best I could . If I told you I had to hose off the ceiling you get the idea of how biblical in scale the episode was.
I walk out and sitting there waiting for me to finish is the female star of the film. I immediately apologise and say I didn’t realise they had given her this room. She says no its fine , she just prefers to use the direction/hod room as its closer to set. I smile tell her I’ll see her on set and go to leave. She gets up and heads to the bathroom .
I didn’t hang around to see the reaction but the bathroom must still have been stinking despite my efforts to clean it up , never mind the fact that she must have heard every detonation , surge and moan from inside whilst waiting.
When she came back to set she gave me such a shocked look I couldn’t help squirming . She wasn’t as chatty with me as she had been before but at least she didn’t mention anything. I’ve worked with her again and luckily grew a beard so I don’t think she recognised me.
I am a child at heart , Ryan and Mr Ds fart and poo stories crack me up.
Years ago when working in Slough I once had to change toilet booths midway through a number 2, shuffling with your keks round your ankle and a semi wiped bum is quite difficult. Luckily I timed it spot on as as soon as I entered the cubicle next door somebody came into the gents.
I am reminded of this, https://www.celebritynetworth.com/ar...t-of-all-time/, (in)famous story.
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