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TZ-UK Fundraiser
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Thread: Profiling a TZ-ER

  1. #151
    Grand Master number2's Avatar
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    Will own an expensive digital camera, to take photos of his expensive Rolex whilst sat at the wheel of his BMW/Audi/MX-5

  2. #152
    Master Wolfie's Avatar
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    Will have a sunny disposition and will generally respect and seek to understand alternative opinions to their own...

  3. #153
    Grand Master number2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by learningtofly View Post
    Don't forget that the Grensons will be from the ladies range.
    Or tan coloured Trickers with 'bright red' laces and contrasting beige leather soles.
    Last edited by number2; 3rd December 2017 at 09:14.
    "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."

    'Populism, the last refuge of a Tory scoundrel'.

  4. #154
    Grand Master number2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by number2 View Post
    With his Cartier wallet, and iphone5iphone x
    "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."

    'Populism, the last refuge of a Tory scoundrel'.

  5. #155
    Master KavKav's Avatar
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    Tactical socks, that is the giveaway!

  6. #156
    Master PipPip's Avatar
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    Will be retired at 48 and mystified as to why all the other idiots go to work. Don’t these people realise there is a big wide world out there full of possibilities like Rolex flipping, Porsche track days, brogue polishing, Japanese knife sharpening and elaborate wet shaving rituals?

  7. #157
    Master raptor's Avatar
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    So many people i know dont live by an excel file making a daily profit and considering it a success
    On the other hand most work for blood sucking companies paying them hood money to be forst class assholes and they want to see something different in this place
    Nevertheless this is a miniature sample of the real word and although we hate it its there and its real

  8. #158
    Master Kirk280's Avatar
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    Multiple personalities

  9. #159
    Grand Master oldoakknives's Avatar
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    Find myself consciously looking for a Honda Accord with a tasteful velour interior. Even though I'm in totally the wrong part of the country.

  10. #160
    Craftsman Jpshell's Avatar
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    Only just found this thread

    Only just bought a MX5

    I'll get my coat (but not a Barbour)

  11. #161
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    Unfeasible quantities of marmalade in the pantry?

  12. #162
    Grand Master wileeeeeey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bambam View Post
    This is one of he funniest threads I've read in a long time!

    I did meet a fellow TZ-er once, and it was in Rolex in St James. Well I say "meet" it was actually that we both posted that day that we'd been here and recognised that we would have been there at the same time.

    I did see someone with a Rolex LV on the tube the other day and was tempted to ask him about it as you don't see many 'in the wild' but normal tube etiquette got the better of me.
    Ah, the rare LV owner who wears his watch and doesn’t have it as NOS in the safe, ready to sell after the next price rise.

  13. #163
    Master yumma's Avatar
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    Me: owns an MX5, just bought my first Rolex, love skiing, love keeping fit, drinks too much, quite depressive, wants more watches. Likes nice things. Looks forward to retirement. Hmmm probably not great but that’s me as a TZ’er.


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  14. #164
    Master
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    Actually, I also met one of the members here when I sold a bike (I think it was a bike anyway), and then a while later (weeks or months later) saw someone manically waving at me on the motorway - and it was the same guy!

  15. #165
    Master RJM25R's Avatar
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    Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

    My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

    My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we’d make meat helmets.

    When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds – pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe.

    At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. At the age of 18, I went off to evil medical school. At the age of 25, I took up tap dancing. I wanted to be a quadruple threat

  16. #166
    Ah Gold Member
    It's just a matter of time...

  17. #167
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    Great bump of an old thread. Should probably add that his wife has a cupboard full of old Michael Kors bags purchased at designer outlets that are relentlessly listed and bumped on SC.

  18. #168
    Master bond's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seamaster73 View Post
    The NATO strap used to be the Masonic indicator of WISDom until the hipster crowd discovered them.
    Couldn’t agree more - until they day Daniel wellingtons die a death I shall never don a nato


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  19. #169
    Master Alansmithee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bond View Post
    Couldn’t agree more - until they day Daniel wellingtons die a death I shall never don a nato


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

    The problem is that now when a young one sees a mature gentleman wearing a NATO they think "look at Granddad trying to be down with the kidz!"

  20. #170
    Grand Master magirus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RJM25R View Post
    Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

    My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

    My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we’d make meat helmets.

    When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds – pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe.

    At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. At the age of 18, I went off to evil medical school. At the age of 25, I took up tap dancing. I wanted to be a quadruple threat

    Now then, when I were a lad . . .
    F.T.F.A.

  21. #171
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alansmithee View Post
    The problem is that now when a young one sees a mature gentleman wearing a NATO they think "look at Granddad trying to be down with the kidz!"
    No they don't... they think what's that strange metal thing on that gits (substitute more hip and happening derogatory term) wrist? ;-)

  22. #172
    His premium NATO strap smells of Creed Aventus

  23. #173
    Quote Originally Posted by Tokyo Tokei View Post
    His premium NATO strap smells of Creed Aventus
    😂😂

  24. #174
    Craftsman hyl1987's Avatar
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    Surely it has to be "Wears a Rolex with Stickers and Tags still on..."

  25. #175
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    Will start numerous threads detailing what cars he's ordered, bought and owned.

    He will also show off about how much money he has to retire on.

  26. #176
    Grand Master magirus's Avatar
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    48.5 inch waist / size 7 feet.
    F.T.F.A.

  27. #177
    Grand Master learningtofly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by magirus View Post
    48.5 inch waist / size 7 feet.

  28. #178
    Master bond's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alansmithee View Post
    The problem is that now when a young one sees a mature gentleman wearing a NATO they think "look at Granddad trying to be down with the kidz!"
    That’s the sad truth of it without a shadow of a doubt


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  29. #179
    Grand Master Rod's Avatar
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    I'm getting there, Trickers, frantic shoe polishing,Barbour jacket, Honda, NATO's, retirement pot, oh does a ' another Bond' stripe dressing gown count?

  30. #180
    Master Templogin's Avatar
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    Will measure the temperature of the water before he pours it in a circular motion into the ground coffee.

    Moisturises. Has more bottles of perfume than his ex-wife.

  31. #181
    Grand Master magirus's Avatar
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    His kitchen knives are so sharp he can shave with them, or use them to lance the piles he gets from sitting at his keyboard all day.
    F.T.F.A.

  32. #182
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    This is one of the best things I've ever read!

  33. #183
    Master KavKav's Avatar
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    Youff looking at old guy: “Silly old fart”!

    Old guy looking at youff: “Gormless looking prat”!

    T’was ever thus.
    Last edited by KavKav; 17th March 2018 at 10:02.

  34. #184
    Grand Master number2's Avatar
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    Update,
    A thorough knowledge of washing machines and vacuum cleaners, the ability to speak authoritatively on hybrid cars whilst driving a chipped diesel Porsche Toureg Rover developing 350 bhp tested on a dyno.
    "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."

    'Populism, the last refuge of a Tory scoundrel'.

  35. #185
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    Quote Originally Posted by Templogin View Post
    Will measure the temperature of the water before he pours it in a circular motion into the ground coffee.

    Moisturises. Has more bottles of perfume than his ex-wife.
    And is probably in the worlds 0.05% of men who know what a ‘split’ is whilst talking about Aventus

    Also he has just bought a ‘XYX watch’ since otherwise he would be all over the one advertised on SC.
    Last edited by higham5; 17th June 2019 at 09:21.

  36. #186
    Master Templogin's Avatar
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    Has vanity plates on every car he owns, and also on the motorbike he spends more time polishing than riding, mainly because he is too fat to get into his Power Rangers leather one-piece. Has £100 cash and wonders the best way to increase his status with this, considers a nice tie and pocket square but ends up with a peacock on a lead to walk around town with.

  37. #187
    Grand Master wileeeeeey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Templogin View Post
    Has vanity plates on every car he owns, and also on the motorbike he spends more time polishing than riding, mainly because he is too fat to get into his Power Rangers leather one-piece. Has £100 cash and wonders the best way to increase his status with this, considers a nice tie and pocket square but ends up with a peacock on a lead to walk around town with.
    Don forget the other 8 on retention.

  38. #188
    Only has Miele kitchen appliances.

  39. #189
    Craftsman Tickeros's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by eagletower View Post
    Only has Miele kitchen appliances.
    Beat me to it. So.............
    Goes jogging in his Canada Goose parka in the middle of July.

  40. #190
    Peacock on a lead!
    Like that idea
    Sounds like a line from “an Englishman in New York”

  41. #191
    Grand Master number2's Avatar
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    Happy to use their mobile phones whilst driving - to photograph their watch.
    "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."

    'Populism, the last refuge of a Tory scoundrel'.

  42. #192
    Master Kirk280's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by number2 View Post
    Happy to use their mobile phones whilst driving - to photograph their watch.
    Whilst driving their fully taxed vintage Porsche, shurley?!

  43. #193
    Grand Master Raffe's Avatar
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    IT'S A RUUUUF, BIMBO!
    Someone who lies about the little things will lie about the big things too.

  44. #194
    Grand Master oldoakknives's Avatar
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    Oh dear.
    Started out with nothing. Still have most of it left.

  45. #195
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    Most were at some point intimately acquainted with Daisy Renton. Some feel guilty about this...

  46. #196
    Grand Master jwg663's Avatar
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    Some appear to have been schooled in the principle of philosophical perspective by Father Dougal McGuire.
    ______

    ​Jim.

  47. #197
    Grand Master SimonK's Avatar
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    Is supremely confident in his choices of clothing and footwear, white goods, holidays, garden tools and financial products having sought the advice and reassurance of complete strangers prior to purchase.

  48. #198
    Craftsman skmark's Avatar
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    Had a good laugh at this and too be honest didn't realize it was an old thread until I saw the reference to the 'jeans' as being 501's.......gasp surely that is blasphemy, they must be at least £500 and handmade by former tin miners in some distant part of wales? And heaven forbid........never, ever wash them.

    Some things never change though........giant sized clothes in SC!

    Surprising lack of motorbike references back in 2013 though.

  49. #199
    Grand Master thieuster's Avatar
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    giant sized clothes in SC!
    And always for sale because the TZ'er lost xxx stone. Never because the seller has gained so much weight that it will not fit anymore.

    M

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